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CURSES! FOILED AGAIN! Yiddish and Irish Maledictions

1/25/2019

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​“CURSES! FOILED AGAIN!”
This was one of the favorite expletives used by Dick Dastardly, a cartoon antagonist created in 1968 by Hanna-Barbera, based on English actor Terry Thomas. Yes, there is a vague family resemblance.
​

▲https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXKJolS9Atg
▼Photo by Silver Screen Collection - Image courtesy gettyimages.com
     https://www.imdb.com/Terry Thomas

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We never find out specifically what misfortunes Dasdardly is wishing upon his enemies, but the kind of curse we’re talking is the “invocation of a supernatural power to inflict harm or punishment on someone or something” kind of curse, not offensive words or phrases kind. We’re all well acquainted with those.

English is a rich language, with mays to describe things, actions, and feelings, some words adding subtle differences to the overall meaning. Words are the tools of writers. It’s our job to put them together to amuse, teach, scare, entice, and entrance readers and put them in places, situations, and times they know well and those they have never experienced.

Yay, Words! Unfortunately, sometimes we use the same words over and over.


Somewhere I read an article by a Jewish author who wrote that, in English, about the worst thing you can wish on a person is to go have a sexual experience. He compared that to Jewish curses, which he felt embodied a true sense of inflicting harm.

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YIDDISH / JEWISH CURSES
Taking that to heart, I did a little research on Yiddish curses, and I have to agree with the anonymous author.


Anglo-Saxon curses tend to deal with body parts, Catholic curses go for blasphemy, and the Middle and Far East curses focus on insulting ancestors. While traditional curses -- inverted blessings -- largely fell out of use in English at some point after Shakespeare’s death and before Hemingway’s birth, they have thrived in Yiddish into the twentieth century.

A
ccording to Marnie Winston-Macauley, “The Yiddish curse has a baroque splendor in its intricate ability to prophesize. The most spectacular lull the victim with a positive opening, which then turns into a juicy, literate, malediction that no mere obscene word could possibly convey. According to the proverb “A curse is not a telegram; it doesn’t arrive so fast.”
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Like Jewish caviar, the Jewish curse must be savored. So, writers who don’t like using swear words in their novels or who perhaps want to enrich the quality of savoring ill will, you should take heed of the following examples of Yiddish curses.
source of photos: http://www.yiddishwit.com/About.html 

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● May what I wish on you come true (most, even half, even just 10%).
● May you turn into a blintz and be eaten by your cat. ​
● May you drink too much castor oil.​
● May someone throw salt in your eyes and pepper in your nose.

● May you run to the toilet every three minutes or every three months.
● May you crap blood and pus.
● May you grow a wooden tongue.
● May your mouth be in your rear.
● May you swallow an umbrella and may it open inside you.

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● May you laugh with lizards --or-- May you crawl on your belly.
● May leeches drink you dry.
​● May I live long enough to bury you.

● May your head fall off.

● May you be transformed into a chandelier, to hang by day and to burn by night.

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● May you grow like an onion with your heard in the ground.
● May you turn into a centipede with ingrown toenails, may onions grow in
   your navel and may you lie in the earth and bake bagels.
 
​● May God should visit upon you the best of the Ten Plagues.
● May venereal disease consume your body.
​
● May you enjoy a good time with plenty of good Vodka – and may your blood turn to whiskey, so that 100 bedbugs get drunk on it and dance the mazurka in your belly button.
● May you get passage out of the old village safely, and when you settle, may you fall into the outhouse just as a regiment of Ukrainians is finishing prune stew and 12 barrels of beer.

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● May you live a hundred and twenty years with a wooden head and glass
   eyes.

● May a wheel run over your skull.

And last, but not least, my favorite.
● May you have a thousand mother-in-laws.

IRISH CURSES
Well, some of those Jewish curses are pretty graphic, and they definitely have the impact of some serious ill will. Can any other culture match that?

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I searched about some Western European counterparts. The Irish, after all, have a long history of creative cursing, so I took a look at those.

According to gaelicmatters.com (no author identified) “We may not like to admit it openly but Irish people swear a lot and we have to be careful when abroad. Our loose tongues can offend U.S and British ears in particular. I smile when Americans refer to the use of 'f@*k' as the F-bomb because of its effect in polite circles. Though not by origin a Gaelic word, in Irish circles the use of the word is commonplace and casual, to the point of rendering it meaningless at times.”

Cursing in other languages often does not translate well into English, or at least in a meaningful way. Irish Gaelic has enriched the way Irish people speak English in many ways. The importing of many a mallacht (the Irish word for a curse) from Gaelic to English has added color, even when more sinister than funny. Here is a sample of Irish Curses.

● Curse of the seven snotty orphans on you!
   (Since I don’t know what the curse of these orphans is, that doesn’t have much impact on me.)
● The crows’ curse on you.
● May you die roarin' like Doran's ass.
● May you all go to hell and not have a drop of porter to quench your eternal thirst.
   (Porter is a type of black beer, like Guinness)
● May the Devil take your last schilling.

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● May the gates of Paradise never open to you.
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● May you never have a hearth to call your own.
● May the lamb of God stir his hoof through the roof of
   heaven and kick you in the arse down to hell.
● May you scratch a beggarman’s back one day.

    (May you lose everything you have.)   ▼Photo: http://clipart-library.com/

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● May you marry in haste and repent at leisure.
● May you have the runs on your wedding night.
● Pissmires (ants) and spiders be in your marriage bed.
● Burning and scorching on you. (Dóite agus loisceadh ort.)
● May you leave without returning. (Imeacht gan teacht ort.)
● May you fall without rising. (Titim gan eiri ort.)
 Drawing by Dean Murray
 ▼Photo source: http://www.deanmurray.com/farting-woman

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● May you marry a wench that blows wind like a stone from a sling.
● Kiss my butt! (Póg mo thoin!) pronounced <pohg muh hoin>
● May the cat eat you and the devil eat the cat!
   (Go n-ithe an cat thú is go n-ithe an diabhal an cat)
● Breaking and crushing to your bones!” (Briseadh agus brú ar do chnámha)
Getty images/imagezoo
▼
Photo source: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/insect-stings

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● May you find the bees but miss the honey!
● May your spuds be like rosary-beads on the stalk.

● May the curse of Mary Malone and her nine blind illegitimate children chase you so far over the Hills of Damnation that the Lord himself can't find you with a telescope.
● May you be a load for four before the year is out. 
(wishing death on someone)
● May you be eaten by an awful itch!
● May the curse of Mary Malone and her nine blind illegitimate children chase you so far over the Hills of Damnation that the Lord himself can't find you with a telescope. 
 

Apparently, the Irish have many of the same ideas of ill will and misfortune, such as the uncontrollable itch, but except for the last one, they tend to lack the dramatic flourish of the Yiddish curses. I was a little disappointed.
 
THE REST OF THE WORLD
I’m sure every culture and religion in the world has its own version of “curses” to wish misfortune on others, just as they all have their “blessings”. However, they are not as easy to find on the internet as you might think. When you Google most of them, you get plain old curse words or definitions of malediction, ill will, curse, or whatever word you used to indicate willing someone bad luck.

It’s true you can add “May you…” to many of them and get a curse, just as many folk sayings can be turned into curses by adding the correct words to put the saying into the proper format. A Scottish example of a curse word (phrase) converted into a malediction by adding “May you…”
     May you suck the sweat off a dead man’s balls.

Yikes! Otherwise, Scottish curses get to be long dramatic recitations against whole countries, families, generations, or other groups of people. For example, in 1525 the reivers (border raiders) had become such a nuisance that the then-Archbishop of Glasgow, Gavin Dunbar, put a curse up all the reivers of the borderlands (and this is only part of the curse).

     "I curse their head and all the hairs of their head; I curse their face, their brain (innermost thoughts), their mouth, their nose, their tongue, their teeth, their forehead, their shoulders, their breast, their heart, their stomach, their back, their womb, their arms, their legs, their hands, their feet, and every part of their body, from the top of their head to the soles of their feet, before and behind, within and without."
     "I curse them going and I curse them riding; I curse them standing and I curse them sitting; I curse them eating and I curse them drinking; I curse them rising, and I curse them lying; I curse them at home, I curse them away from home; I curse them within the house, I curse them outside of the house; I curse their wives, their children, and their servants who participate in their deeds. I (bring ill wishes upon) their crops, their cattle, their wool, their sheep, their horses, their swine, their geese, their hens, and all their livestock. I (bring ill wishes upon) their halls, their  chambers, their kitchens, their stanchions, their barns, their cowsheds, their barnyards, their cabbage patches, their plows, their harrows, and the goods and houses that are necessary for their sustenance and welfare."


That’s a little long and overdone for cursing someone who cuts in front of you on the freeway.

Another way to search for real curses is to Google folk tales, legends, proverbs, magic spells, and so on. Those are convertible as well, but it is hardly worth the effort. No one else has bedbugs dancing the mazurka in your belly button. 

P.S. A writer can avoid using so many curse words by putting some of them in other languages if it's logical for your story, and one character can insult another with legitimate words that not most people don't know.

Just sayin’.□

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Sources
https://ireland-calling.com/wisdom-may-the-cat/
http://www.gaelicmatters.com/irish-curses.html
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dick_Dastardly
http://yiddishradioproject.org/exhibits/stutchkoff/curses.php3
https://www.kveller.com/these-yiddish-curses-are-pretty-epic/
https://thoughtcatalog.com/nico-lang/2013/10/61-hilarious-yiddish-insults-you-need-to-know/
https://forward.com/schmooze/358803/why-dont-people-use-yiddish-curses-properly-in-english/
http://www.aish.com/j/fs/Yiddish_Curses_for_the_New_Millennium.html
https://www.irishtimes.com/life-and-style/abroad/54-irish-curses-you-won-t-have-learned-in-school-1.3011527
http://www.gaelicmatters.com/irish-curses.html
https://www.irishcentral.com/roots/swears-cursing-irish-gaeilge
https://www.irishcentral.com/roots/top-ten-strange-and-weird-irish-curses-when-you-really-want-to-hex-your-enemy-171586881-237766231
https://erinsromance.wordpress.com/tag/irish-curses/
https://lovindublin.com/feature/best-irish-curse-words
http://clipart-library.com/

Book: 
Awa' an' Bile Yer Heid!: Scottish Curses and Insults By David Ross

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A SHEEP, A DUCK, AND A ROOSTER: A Brief History of the First Hot Air Balloons

1/18/2019

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UP, UP, AND AWAY
Get out your bucket list (if you're old enough to have one) or your to-do list. Either way, Hot air ballooning should be on it.
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It's an amazing, almost out-of-body experience. Except when the burners are firing there is complete silence. Plus, you feel as though you're standing on air... because you are. Almost. There's nothing more than a between the soles of your shoes and thin air but a few layers of woven Kooboo and Palambang cane.                          
Photo source: US Department of Transportation
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I'm not a balloonist, but I've been on rides in three different locations. You see the world from a different perspective. Hey, you don't want to be outdone by a sheep, a duck, and a rooster, do you?

THE BROTHERS MONTGOLFIER
Hot air ballooning is the oldest successful form of man-made flight, dating back to 1783. Even before that, the two brothers named Joseph-Michel and Jacques-Etienne Montgolfier (successful paper manufacturers) began experimenting with paper vessels elevated by heated air after they observed that heated air flowing directly into a paper or fabric bag made the bag rise.

PictureJoseph-Michel and Jacques-Etienne Montgolfier – Photo source: https://www.famousinventors.org/montgolfier-brothers
During the next few years, they developed a hot air balloon comparable in design to modern balloons, only powered by burning straw, manure and other material in an attached fire pit.
By 1782, the Montgolfier's constructed an ‘aerostat’ designed for lifting people into the air which they named ‘Seraphina’. The craft – and I use the term loosely -- was a 40 foot envelope made of linen lined with paper. Constructed in multiple sections, it was held together by some 2000 buttons.
After some additional testing, the first public showing took place in Annonay (near Lyon, France) on June 4, 1783. The brothers launched their balloon with no one aboard from the town marketplace. It rose to a height somewhere between 5,500 and 6,500 feet, remained aloft for 10 minutes, and traveled more than a mile.                          The Aerostat Reveillon
                                                                                                                                                          http://levenvandelucht.blogspot.com/2016/08/lichter-dan-lucht.html
                                                                                                                                                  photo source: https://2.bp.blogspot.com/Montgolfier_brothers_flight.jpg


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Word of their success quickly spread, and a demonstration for the king was planned. For this flight, the brothers recruited Jean-Baptiste Réveillion, a successful wallpaper manufacturer.

They constructed a balloon about 30 feet in diameter made of taffeta and coated with a varnish of alum for fireproofing. Réveillion's influence was apparent as the balloon was decorated with golden flourishes, zodiac signs, and suns (symbolizing King Louis XVI).

​A SHEEP, A DUCK, AND A ROOSTER
There was some concern about the effects of high altitude on living beings, and the king proposed a test using prisoners.
Instead, the Montgolfiers suspended a basket below the balloon containing a sheep, a duck, and a rooster. It was actually a scientifically sound idea. The sheep's physiology was thought to be similar to a human's. The high-flying duck was unlikely to be harmed, so it was used as a control. The rooster was included as a further control because while it was also a bird, it did not fly at high altitudes.
​
The balloon, named Aerostat Reveillon, and its passengers lifted off on Sept. 19, 1783. The flight lasted 8 minutes and was witnessed by King Louis XVI, Marie Antoinette, and a crowd of 130,000. The balloon stayed airborne for fifteen minutes, flew about 2 miles, and landed safely. No word on how they measured the height or the fate of the sheep, duck, and rooster.

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The launching of the Aerostat Reveillon in Paris Painting depicting the launch- photo source: http://www.dragonfireballoon.com/ballooning_history.html

​The brothers must have been pretty clever. They convinced Pilatre de Rozier and the Marquis d'Arlandes to be the first people to travel in a hot air balloon. You notice it wasn't the Montgolfiers taking flight in November of 1783. De Rozier and d'Arlandes are reported to have traveled 7 miles in a have hour at the height of 3,000 feet.   
PictureFrancis Pilatre de Rozier blowing hydrogen into a flame National Air and Space Museum – Smithsonian Institution
Presumably they didn't crash since de Rozier decided to build his own balloon containing hot air and hydrogen.

In June of 1785, he and a friend (Pierre Romain) embarked on a trip from Boulogne to England. At an altitude of about 2,950 feet, the hydrogen, expanded by the hot air, exploded. The two men achieved the dubious distinction of being the first men to lose their lives in a manned flight.


The Champagne Tradition
One of the early traditions which is still practiced is for the pilot to present the landowner on whose property you make your final landing with a ceremonial bottle of champagne.


This tradition reputedly originated with these first balloonists. As you can imagine, the early hot air balloons were filled with not just hot air but smoke, due to a slight mistake by scientists of that era who believed the lift was due to the smoke rather than the heat.

Because of that, the first balloonists landing in peasants' farm fields were likely to be attacked with stones and clubs and pitchforks, since they were obviously fire-breathing monsters. French peasants came with a certain level of sophistication, however. Early French balloonists found the peasants easily distracted, and much more pleasant hosts, if the monster's human occupants offered them a glass of champagne. □
 Sources:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hot_air_ballooning
http://www.hot-air-ballooning.org/guide_hot_air_ballooning_hints_and_tips.asp
http://ezinearticles.com/?Hot-Air-Ballooning---Different-Techniques-To-Keep-In-Minds&id=5741808
http://www.eballoon.org/balloon/basket.html
http://www.pilatre-de-rozier.com/
http://www.eballoon.org/history/history-of-ballooning.html
http://www.spartacus.schoolnet.co.uk/AVrozier.htm
http://www.balloon.co.za/Balloon/
http://www.hotairballoonsafaris.co.za/
https://www.space.com/16595-montgolfiers-first-balloon-flight.html
https://empoweryourknowledgeandhappytrivia.wordpress.com/2015/10/08/who-invented-the-first-hot-air-balloon/
https://www.famousinventors.org/montgolfier-brothers






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hOW DID YOU GET MY NUMBER? Telemarketing and telephone Scams

1/11/2019

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You yell at the telemarketer on the telephone, “How the #$%^ did you people get my private telephone number?”

​Then you slam down the receiver and, swearing again, flop on the couch with a migraine coming to a full boil at the back of your head.
​
Has this ever happened to you?

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Whether we like it or not, any time we give personal information to anyone, to social media, to businesses or financial institutions, even the doctor’s office, we give away personal information that can be used by telemarketers and scammers to contact us. We often do this because it is a condition for obtaining the product or service we want. Tough apples.
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DID YOU READ THE SMALL PRINT?

We also receive in the mail (or it’s written in fine print somewhere on the application form) disclosure notices which inform us how our private information is shared. Federal law allows consumers the ability to limit some, but not all, sharing. To invoke the limitations, you must opt out by signing the documents and sending them back to the entity that sent them.
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Do you read the small print? Do you sign and mail off the disclosure forms every year for every credit card, financial institution, vendor, etc. providing the option? I don’t. My information is out there already. What’s the point of opting out now?

o, my information is shared. The consequences, whether you opt out or not, seem to be a deluge of unwanted telephone calls from telemarketers, from business doing construction or something else in your neighborhood and want to drop by, from charities, from politicians, from everyone pursuing a cause and, most dangerous of all, from scammers.

Occasionally, we get phone calls from people we know or do business with.

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​​TELEPHONE SCAMS AND ROBOCALLS
The Federal Trade Commission tells us that robocalls -- automated telephone calls that deliver a recorded message, typically on behalf of a political party or telemarketing company – are the number one complaint they receive. In 2017 alone there were 7,157,370 complaints filed against robocallers and telemarketers. And how many of us have never filed a complaint? A zillion?

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RULES OF THUMB TO PROTECT YOURSELF
While telemarketing is legal, scamming is not. There are a number of ways to protect yourself. Remember, both the telemarketer and the scammer – regardless of the type of scam -- wants you to pick up the phone and talk, and they don’t want to give you time to think. The FTC suggests you just not answer. If you do, here is some advice.

●Don’t answer calls from phone numbers you don’t recognize.
.
●Don’t give away financial and sensitive personal information (address, date of birth, bank information, ID numbers, passwords, mother’s maiden name, etc.) over the phone, and be careful when and where you do give it when you do.

●Don’t confirm this type of information even if the unknown caller has it.

●Don’t believe your caller ID: Technology makes it easy for scammers to fake caller ID information, so the name and number you see aren’t always real. If someone calls asking for money or personal information, hang up. If you think the caller might be telling the truth, call back to a number you know is genuine.

​●Don’t talk. If you suspect a scam, Hang up. Anything you say to a telemarketer, including legitimate ones -- that is, not a scam -- will end up written down in your file. Telemarketers uses the "Three Nos" rule: don't let the customer go until they have said "no" three times during the phone call.

●Don’t say the word “Yes.”

●Listen for key phrases to spot scammers.

●Be cautious about where and to whom your phone number is available. Not a good idea on social media.

●Turn the tables. Ask the caller for more information, do some research, and call them back. If they’re reluctant to comply, they’re likely trying to scam you.

●Don’t call back. Even though you want to find out who it is and bust their balls. You could still be giving them information they want.

●Check your bank and credit card statements regularly, especially after getting a suspicious call.

● Don’t send money anywhere for an emergency situation, unless you have verified the situation and the solicitor.

● Don’t send money by prepaid card or wire transfer (which are difficult to track) to someone you don’t know.

●Check out charities before you contribute, and don’t make commitments over the phone. Even the legitimate ones will pressure you, often into making a larger contribution than you want to give.

● Sign up for free scam alerts
from the FTC at https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/features/scam-alerts

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TELEPHONE SHOPPING
​Now days many people do order merchandise and services over the phone. There are ways in which you can protect yourself from scams for this, but they are different than calls coming to your phone uninvited. In this case, you are calling, or have called, them and should have some reason to believe you are calling a legitimate business.

●Be skeptical about free trial offers: Some companies use free trials to sign you up for products and bill you every month until you cancel. Before you agree to a free trial, research the company and read the cancellation policy. And always review your monthly statements for charges you don’t recognize.

●Ask about shipping and handling costs before you commit to a purchase.

●Don’t let yourself be rushed.

●Don’t pay upfront for a promise: Someone might ask you to pay in advance for things like debt relief, credit and loan offers, mortgage assistance, or a job. They might even say you’ve won a prize, but first you have to pay taxes or fees. If you do, they will probably take the money and disappear. 

●Consider how you pay: Credit cards have significant fraud protection built in, but some payment methods don’t. Wiring money through services like Western Union or MoneyGram is risky because it’s nearly impossible to get your money back. That’s also true for reloadable cards (like MoneyPak or Reloadit) and gift cards (like iTunes or Google Play). Government offices and honest companies won’t require you to use these payment methods.

●Talk to someone you trust: Before you give up your money or personal information, talk to someone you trust. Con artists want you to make decisions in a hurry. They might even threaten you. Slow down, check out the story, do an online search, consult an expert — or just tell a friend.

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TYPES OF TELEPHONE SCAMS
The first three types of scams listed below are most common telephone scams, but there are many others you ought to be aware of.

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​● IRS
This is one of the most common scams and usually targets the elderly. The “campaign” begins around tax time. You’ll receive a phone call from the “IRS” telling you that you’re receiving your final notice for money owed. If you do not pay this money you’re threatened with jail time, huge fines, or deportation. Sometimes they ask for personal information, including your SSI number. These scammers know people fear the IRS and hope that their impulse is to call the fake number back and rectify the situation.

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● Tech support
This scam is growing rapidly and targets those who are not computer savvy. You’ll get a call pretending to be Microsoft Support, and they will inform you that your computer is compromised and you need to download special software to protect yourself. The caller conveniently needs your credit card information through this scenario.
​
To prove it, the caller might ask you to check your Windows event log viewer, which is likely to contain thousands of records about various errors, most or all of which are actually nothing to worry about. If you bite, the caller then asks you to log onto a Web service that lets him or her take control of your computer. The goal of this phone scam is to install malware that can steal your personal information or trick you into enrolling in phony computer maintenance or warranty programs.

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​● Sweepstakes
Here, the callers claims you have won a “Free” or “low cost” vacation and other sweepstakes prize. "Free" can end up cost­ing a bundle in hidden costs. Usually, they are just a prompt to receive personal information such as home address or even credit card information. Never give personal information to these callers, especially over the phone.

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​● Government grants scam
The bait is that you’re being offered free money from the government, just because you’ve been a good citizen, or you’ve qualified to receive a “free grant” to pay for education costs, home repairs, home business expenses, or unpaid bills. The catch with this phone scam is that you must pay a “processing fee” of $150 to $700 to receive the grant. Or scammers ask for your checking account information so they can “deposit your grant directly into your account”—and then clean out your account.

By the way, the caller might he’s from the “Federal Grants Administration.” There is no such government agency. This scam works in part because the legitimate agencies, offering government programs, calls in the same manner and often says nearly the same thing.

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● Call Center Fraud
Scam artists spend hours calling the customer service centers of banks, insurance companies and other institutions, posing as people like you, to try to access accounts. “That’s because reps only ask a couple of simple authentication questions — maybe your mother’s maiden name or your Social Security number — before you can transfer money or do whatever,” explains Ken Shuman of Pindrop, a company that provides antifraud services to call centers. 
Scammers start by assembling information on you, stolen in data breaches, purchased on the “dark web” or gleaned with a simple Google search. Then they spend all day phoning different call centers to determine if you have accounts with those companies. With your data in hand, they can often answer the authentication questions that call centers ask.
​ 
● Smartphone Swindles (Smishing)
20 billion text messages sent each day are attempts at fraud through the use of “smishing” (a combination of the SMS technology that sends text messages and phishing, a ploy to coax confidential information out of you). Typically, a scam texter will fake a problem with one of your financial accounts and ask you for data. Or they might pitch low-cost mortgages or credit cards, or promise free gift cards. If you respond by texting back confidential personal information, your identity may be stolen. Millions of these smishing texts
can be launched simultaneously.  

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● The neighbor ploy
Remember, the scammer wants you to pick up. Your area code and prefix are displayed, so the call appears to be from a neighbor or nearby business. “Fewer people are comfortable blocking local numbers, increasing scammers’ success rates,” notes Jonathan Nelson of Hiya. Fake number are hard for law enforcement to track.

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● The call is from your own phone number
In this scam, the scammer can simulate your own phone number on your caller ID. Curiosity, if nothing else, may cause you to answer. These scammers can maneuver around any call blocking that you’ve set up.
​
● The one-ring rip-off
In this case criminals program auto-dialers to make repeated calls to you, each disconnecting after just one ring. The intention is to make you so frustrated that you call back the displayed number to find out who it is. Things get worse if you call area codes, such as 268, 664 and 876, which are for Caribbean countries and other places with have high per-minute phone charges. One scam involves getting you to call one of those numbers, then getting you to hold through transfers that rack up your bill until a scammer gets on the line and starts a fraudulent pitch.

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●  Loan Scams
Some loans are borderline scams in the first place, so it’s almost no surprise that they’d also be used as a cover for phone scams. Advance fee loans, payday loans, credit card protection and offers to lower your credit card interest rates are some of the popular scams. The goal of the scammer is to harvest your information over the phone. 

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​● Debt Collector Scams
Debt collector scams are fairly popular because the high rate of debt in our economy. The best thing to do is to ask for the caller’s information, including company name, and to call them back. Also, take note that if you send a written letter to a debt collector asking them to stop calling you, they are legally required to do so according to most of my references.

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● Credit Card Security Number Scams
As we’ve mentioned, it’s not a smart idea to give out credit card information over the telephone. But, what about just snippets of information? Though it may seem harmless, even giving out the three-digit security code on the back of your credit card (also known as the CVV number) can lead to being scammed. The scammer can disguise themselves as a bank employee, even giving out a fake employee badge number. Make sure to never give out that CVV number, no matter what they say.

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● Warrant and Jury Duty Scams
Whether it’s the DEA, FBI, sheriff, or local police department, warrant scams are designed to make victims panic and then give up their personal information over the phone. The scammer will often state that you’ve missed jury duty or perhaps defrauded a bank, and attempt to get payment information. However, law enforcement demanding money is just something that does not happen legally over the phone. Remember that.

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●  Medical Scams
If you’ve ever dealt with health care, you probably know how difficult it is to dispute a hospital bill, causing people to fall for medically related telephone scams. Sometimes the scammer will demand payment on an “unpaid” bill, while other times the scam will offer discounted or free medical services. Unfortunately, these types of scams tend to target the elderly, who have to deal with health care much more than younger people.

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● Lottery Scams
As with most things in life, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Getting a call out of the blue that you’ve just won the lottery is a pretty big stretch. Add in that it’s a lottery in a foreign country, and things begin to sound fishy. When someone asks for your credit card information over the phone, that’s as good a sign as any that the whole thing is a sham. After all, how many lotteries have you heard of that give out winnings to people who haven’t bought a ticket?

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● Stranded in a Foreign Country
Although many of these scams come by e-mail, some are by telephone. I got taken by one of these. 
Mine was one of the standards: a call from a frantic grandchild who is in difficulty (arrested, in a car accident, or something they need money for immediately). In my case the caller knew my grandson’s name, which took me off balance, and I believed him. I did get my money back, but I was so lucky.
​

The scams encourage recipients to send money or account information to the person supposedly "stuck" in a foreign country, or similarly in need. These calls appear to come from someone the recipient knows -- either a familiar name, or a familiar address, scrounged from a hacked account or from publicly visible information on social networking sites. Don’t send money, no matter who they claim to be, and check out the information.

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● Charitable Causes and Natural Disasters
It’s a sad state of affairs when requests for recent disaster relief contributions are often scams, and they are common over the phone. If you want to contribute, you should call the charity. News Channels on TV usually tell you how to make a donation.

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​● Extended car warranties
Scammers find out what kind of car you drive, and when you bought it so they can urge you to buy overpriced — or worthless — plans.


SPOTTING THE SCAM
Sometimes it’s not easy to tell the difference between a scam call and a real one. Informing yourself is most important. The following is advice given by all of the sources I reviewed.


● A real company will not call you out of the blue and ask for personal information.
● If a caller asks “What number did I call?”, you ask “What number did you dial?”
●
 If a caller asks “Is this Mr. Brown?” answer with the word “speaking”, not “yes.”

● The IRS will never contact you by phone; they will send a letter, probably a certified one.
● Technical Support will never call you first about technical problems. You have to call them.
● Companies like Microsoft have other ways of contacting you and would never call on the phone.

Watch out for the following phrases. If you hear a line that sounds similar, the FTC recommends you say "no, thank you," and hang up. Never respond with “Yes”. That can be manipulated to make it sound like you agreed to something.
 

● "You'll get a free bonus if you buy our product."
● "You've won one of five valuable prizes."
● "You've won big money in a foreign lottery."
● "This investment is low risk and provides a higher return than you can get anywhere else."
● "You have to make up your mind right away."
● "You trust me, right?"
● "You don't need to check our company with anyone."
● "We'll just put the shipping and handling charges on your credit card."
● “Can you hear me?” or “Are you the lady of the house?”
● “We’re working in your neighborhood, and you’ve been selected for a free paint job.”

WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT
●Join the National “Do Not Call” List
Register your home and mobile phone numbers with the National Do Not Call Registry. It won’t stop unsolicited calls, but it will stop most. Ones that still come, you should report to the Registry. http://www.donotcall.gov

●File a complaint with the FTC
Report your experience to the FTC online https://www.ftccomplaintassistant.gov/#crnt&panel1-1 or by calling 1-888-382-1222.
 
●Download a Spam Blocking App
A good way to block calls on both land lines and cell phones is to use Google Voice https://voice.google.com/about.  You have the option of sending them directly to voicemail, treating all their calls as spam, or blocking them entirely. If you don't have a Google Voice account and you live in the US, you can sign up at

https://support.google.com/voice/answer/7207482?co=GENIE.Platform%3DDesktop&hl=en


●Post offenders on Community Call
     800Notes is a free Reverse Phone Number Lookup database built by its users. Our strength is in our numbers - by sharing pieces of information each of us has we are putting together a free and public phone number directory with information no other service can provide. https://800notes.com/
     ▪ Find out who is calling and why. Look up and read previous report by other users.
     ▪Report telemarketing calls
     ▪Report telephone fraud
     ▪Check out a business

     ThisCaller.com helps you ind unknown caller information by using free reverse phone lookup.
     
https://alternativeto.net/software/thiscaller/http:/www.thiscaller.com/
​

     USCallers.com USCallers.com is a free, reverse phone lookup service for both cell and landline
     phone numbers.
https://alternativeto.net/software/uscallers/  This site can direct you to other sites for
     looking up telemarketing and scam callers.

      http://www.moreofit.com/similar-to/800notes.com/Top_10_Sites_Like_800notes/

●Sign up for Scam Alerts:   https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/features/scam-alerts

● Contact your cable or internet service
Many companies, including Verizon, AT&T, T-Mobile, Sprint, and U.S. Cellular, have introduced services that alert you an incoming robocall may be from a scammer or spammer. In some cases, such services are free, but for a few dollars more per month you can get a more robust version that can block the robocalls from ringing on your phone.

Sources
https://www.robokiller.com/blog/how-to-identify-a-scam-call/
https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles/0076-phone-scams
https://relayservice.gov.au/faqs/how-do-i-know-a-call-is-genuine-and-not-a-scam/
https://www.consumerreports.org/consumer-protection/how-to-identify-a-phone-scam/
https://www.aarp.org/money/scams-fraud/info-2017/no-talk-phone-scams.html
http://backgroundchecks.org/reverse-phone-lookup/phone-scams
https://who-calledme.com/
https://www.trapcall.com/blog/how-to-deal-with-fake-calls/
https://www.revealname.com/free-phone-number-lookup-no-charge
https://www.ftccomplaintassistant.gov/#crnt&panel1-1
https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles/0060-10-things-you-can-do-avoid-fraud
https://mbtskoudsalg.com/explore/phone-clipart-guy/ (free clip art)
https://drexel.edu/it/help/viruses/scams/stuckforeignscams/
https://www.consumerreports.org/robocalls/best-ways-to-fight-robocalls/
https://lifehacker.com/im-a-telemarketer-heres-how-to-get-rid-of-me-1540911401
https://support.google.com/voice/answer/7207482?co=GENIE.Platform%3DDesktop&hl=en 



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A WORD ABOUT WORDS

1/4/2019

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​“THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD”
But less mighty than body language and tone of voice. Experts who study the various –ologies dealing with human communication belief is that 55% of communication is body language, 38% is the tone of voice, and 7% is the actual words spoken.

The smallest component – words -- are all the writer has to create a mood or setting; describe a character or an environment; depict sound, odors, textures, and movement; show what characters are doing, saying, and thinking but not saying. Words show the actions and thoughts that create motivation.

The English language is rich and diverse medium to work with. It’s the writer’s task to know words and how to use them to best to sweep the reader into places, feelings, and situations they have never experienced.

https://englishlive.ef.com/words-english

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HOW MANY WORDS ARE IN ENGLISH LANGUAGE?
When one googles this question the answer is usually given in terms of how many word are defined in a given dictionary.

The Second Edition of the 20-volume Oxford English Dictionary, published in 1989, contains full entries for 171,476 words in current use, and 47,156 obsolete words. To this may be added around 9,500 derivative words included as subentries.

Webster's Third New International Dictionary, Unabridged, together with its 1993 Addenda Section, includes some 470,000 entries

In fact, there is no way to count the number of words because of several realities:
     ● First and foremost, language is a living entity which grows, declines, and changes with time, environment, culture, technological advances, fashion, and whim. Language is like every other living entity in that respect, and there is no way we can do anything about it.
    ● Second, words are constantly being absorbed into English from other languages, such as “cannoli” or "teriyaki." Personally, I’ve observed that often the absorbed word looses in the translation and doesn’t mean in English what it meant in the original language.    
    ● Third, the numerous inflected words, plurals, compound words, and abbreviations leave too many decisions as to what constitutes a word. For example, are all of the inflected forms of "drive," "drives," "drove," etc.–one word or several separate words?

​As the Oxford Dictionary puts it, “Is dog one word, or two (a noun meaning 'a kind of animal', and a verb meaning 'to follow persistently')? If we count it as two, then do we count inflections separately too (e.g. dogs = plural noun, dogs= present tense of the verb). Is dog-tired a word, or just two other words joined together? Is hot dog really two words, since it might also be written as hot-dog or even hotdog
?”

         Dog                                    Dogs                        Tired Dog                      Dog Tired                        Hot Dog

Nonetheless, Webster concedes that the vocabulary of English is estimated at roughly a million words. “… most linguists would take that estimate with a chunk of salt, and some have said they wouldn't be surprised if it is off the mark by a quarter-million (additional words).” If you could say one word per second, it would take about four years to say every word in the language.

WHEN IS A WORD NOT A WORD?
So, if there are about a million words in English and only, say, half of them are found in dictionaries, we have about half a million plus homeless words hanging around out there. Why aren’t these legitimate words?
 
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They are legitimate. A word doesn’t need to be in a dictionary to be a real word. New words are added to the dictionary only when they have already been used, spoken and written, often enough in common speech and writing to become almost cliché.

Now days, new words are used initially by specialists and subcultures, then gradually spread to the rest of us. Every word moves at its own pace; there is no average speed for a word’s acceptance into the language, the culture, and the dictionary. The dictionary’s job is to report that usage as it enters the general vocabulary. There are several reasons why words are not in the dictionary:
     ● Not all English-speaking cultures use the same words, and those which are the same may have different meanings. In fact, not all areas of an English-speaking country use the same words.
     ● Many are scientific terms, such as names of chemicals and scientific instruments, or terms used in professional and other specialized subcultures, and are peripheral to common English usage.
     ● Foreign language words.
     ● Slang.
Because many homeless words come and go guickly, they never achieve enough common usage to be promoted into a dictionary entry.

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WHO DOESN’T LOVE A FIZGIG?
Once a word hits the dictionary citation threshold, isn’t it a word forever? Perhaps in the academic and historical sense, but not in terms of the spoken and written language.

Some experts, such as Edward Allhusen, publisher and author of many books, including Betrumped: The Surprising History of 3,000 Long-Lost, Exotic and Endangered Words, bemoan the tragedy of allowing obsolete words slip away into obscurity. As much as we all love a fizgig, we have to remember language is a living entity. Words can and do die out just like anything else, even though they may offer more precise meanings than those that are added. 
Words end up on Death Row or become obsolete because:

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● They have become irrelevant because they refer to physical objects, ideas, or beliefs that don’t exist anymore. No one born before 1984 had ever heard of a floppy disk, and few born after 2004 have either.
     ● The faster technological and cultural advancement moves, the shorter-lived many words, particularly technical ones. Fashionable terms can become passé, and words can be superseded by other ways of speaking.
     ● They have been replaced with other words, shortened, or abbreviated; it seems our communication technology today fosters the simplification of common usage.
     ● Slang terms that have become “uncool” because everyone is using them now, not just the subculture that created them just to be different.

​When one starts to feel awkward using a particular word, then it’s probably past its prime: under-utilized, unloved, and unwanted. “Fortnight” is a good example. There are many words for a “week”, particularly with the globalization of English. Why don’t we have a word for two weeks, and not three? Why don’t we have fort days? The word has become useless.

According to Benedict Brook, www.news.com.au/technology/words-on-death-row,
“The reason language changes is because each generation has to learn a language for themselves, and what they do is construct a slightly changed version.”


NEW WORDS FOR A NEW YEAR
In September, 2018, The Merriam Webster Dictionary added eight hundred and forty new entries and the Oxford English Dictionary added fourteen hundred. All entries are not necessarily new words. Those considered “new” words may be ones we’ve been hearing and using for years and are just now making it into the dictionary. “New” words may be abbreviated forms for other words and phrases we use in casual speech. They may be slang, portmanteau [blended words], redefined or Latinx, a gender-neutral alternative to Latina and Latino.

A few articles identified general categories for new words, and I did my best to place a sample in each, but who knows? 

Abbreviations
●TL;DR = "Too long; didn't read” Used to say that something requires too much time to read.
●FWIW = For what it's worth.
●ICYMI = In case you missed it. Used in electronic communication to draw attention to something noteworthy.
●ROFL = Rolling on the floor laughing.

Shortened Words
●FAVE = Favorite. Dates back to 1938. First usage: "Lester Harding, heavy fave here, clicks with pop songs.”
●ADORBS = Extremely charming or appealing : adorable.
●GUAC = Guacamole.
●MARG = Margarita.
●AVO = Avocado.
●DEFFO = Definitely, certainly.
●BOUGIE = A disparaging term for people obsessed with wealth or its trappings.
Shortened form of bourgeoise.

Portmanteau [Blended Words]
●MOCKTAIL = A usually iced drink made with any of various ingredients (such as juice, herbs, and soda water) but without alcohol: a nonalcoholic cocktail.
●GLAMP = Glamorous camping.
Glamping is a portmanteau of glamorous and camping and describes a style of camping with amenities and, in some cases, resort-style services not usually associated with "traditional" camping. Usually not outdoors.

●SCHNOODLE = A mix of schnauzer and poodle.
●CHIWEENIE = A mix of Chihuahua and dachshund.
●YORKIE-POO = A mix of Yorkshire terrier and poodle.
●WEBISODE = An episode of a show that may or may not have been telecast but can be viewed at a website
●STAYCATION = A vacation spent at home or nearby.

Old Words With New Meanings
●HOPHEAD = A beer enthusiast.
Originally a slang word, dating back to 1883, for a drug addict.
●GOAT = Greatest of all time. You'll usually hear the acronym as a descriptor for people like LeBron James, Serena Williams, or Tom Brady.

● DUMPSTER FIRE = An utterly calamitous or mismanaged situation. First used in 2008.
● DARK CHOCOLATE = This recently added compound word is meant to clarify that dark chocolate is more than just dark in color, as it usually contains a higher percentage of cocoa and no milk.

New Words
●AIRPLANE MODE = "An operating mode for an electronic device (such as a mobile phone) in which the device does not connect to wireless networks and cannot send or receive communications (such as calls or text messages) or access the Internet but remains usable for other functions."
●AIR PUNCH = An act of thrusting one's clenched fist into the air, typically as a gesture of jubilation or triumph.
●BUDGIE SMUGGLERS = men’s brief, tight-fitting swimming trunks.
●BUTT UGLY = extremely unattractive
●BEDUNGED = That which has been soiled with or covered in dung.
First recorded from the early 15th century. It persists in modern use, but is now considered archaic or used self-consciously for stylistic effect.
●BINGEABLE = Having multiple episodes /parts that can be watched in rapid succession.
●BIOHACKING = Biological experimentation (as by gene editing or the use of drugs or implants) done to improve the qualities or capabilities of living organisms especially by individuals and groups outside of a traditional medical or scientific research environment.
●CARBON FOOTPRINT = The amount of greenhouse gases (specifically carbon dioxide) emitted by something during a given period.
●CRYPTOCURRENCY = Digital currencies use cryptography (i.e., computerized encoding) to prevent counterfeiting.

●DEMONYM = The word you use to describe where you're from.
●FINTECH = Products and companies that employ newly developed digital and online technologies in the banking and financial services industries.
●FORCE QUIT = To force an unresponsive computer program to shut down.
●GENERATION Z = The generation of people born in the late 1990s and early 2000s.
●HAPTICS = The use of electronically or mechanically generated movement that a user experiences through the sense of touch as part of an interface (such as on a gaming console or smartphone).
●HANGRY = irritable or angry because of hunger. First used in 1956.
●HOCKEY MOM = A mother who devotes a great deal of time and effort to supporting her children’s participation in ice hockey.
●INSTAGRAM = To post (a picture) to the Instagram photo-sharing service.
●KOMBUCHA = A fermented tea drink packed in probiotics thanks to the magical effects of yeast and beneficial bacteria.
●LISTICLE = a piece of writing or other content presented wholly or partly in the form of a list.
●LATINX = Of, relating to, or marked by Latin American heritage. Used as a gender-neutral alternative to Latino or Latina.
●NOTHINGBURGER = A person or thing of no importance, value, or substance, especially something which, contrary to expectations, turns out to be insignificant or unremarkable.
First used in 1953 by the Hollywood gossip columnist Louella Parsons, nothingburger is the earliest known example of a type of slang formation in which -burger is used to form compounds referring to a person or thing characterized by a particular quality. Another well-known example of this type is mouseburger(1970).
●PREDICTIVE = As in predictive text: "Of, relating to, or usable or valuable for prediction.
●PREPPER = A person who or thing which prepares or readies something’ as well as a more recent and specific one, ‘a person who anticipates a catastrophic disaster or emergency occurring on a local or global scale and actively prepares for it, typically by learning survival skills, preparing to become self-sufficient, and stockpiling food, ammunition, and other supplies. The earliest use of latter meaning is from a 1998 post on a Usenet newsgroup.
●SCOOBY SNACK  = A snack, especially given as a reward or inducement; specifically a bite-sized treat or a large multilayered sandwich. Also: food eaten to satisfy a hunger induced by drinking, smoking, or drug use.
●STARTER MARRIAGE = A short-lived first marriage between young adults, viewed as a form of preparation for a subsequent, more lasting one with different partners.
●TENT CITY = A collection of many tents set up in an area to provide usually temporary shelter (as for displaced or homeless people).
●UPDATION = The action or an act of updating something, a nominalization of the verb update. The word is first attested in American English, and there is evidence of its use around the world, but it is overwhelmingly associated with Indian English.
●TZATZIKI = A garlicky Greek yogurt dip.*
* Foods have to appear on enough menus to make the crossover into English.
●TIME SUCK = An activity that takes a lot of time you could have used to do more productive things. This word dates back to 1991, the year the Internet gained its first website. Coincidence?
●WELP = an unspecific response like hmm, ooh, and mm-hmm, which are also n the dictionary.
●ZOODLE = A long, thin strip of zucchini that resembles a string or narrow ribbon of pasta.
 
THE LAST WORD
In case you’re still wondering what a fizgig is…

Definition of FIZGIG
1.   A gadding flirting girl or woman. (Ancient definition)
2.   A firework of damp powder that fizzes or hisses when it explodes
3.   A whirligig or spinning toy which makes a whirring sound, like a top.
4.   Fishgig: A fishing sword with two or more barbed prongs.
5.   In Australian, a snitch or police informer.


Sources
​https://www.merriam-webster.com/words-at-play/new-words-in-the-dictionary-september-2018
https://www.merriam-webster.com/help/faq-words-into-dictionary
https://www.merriam-webster.com/help/faq-how-many-english-words
http://mentalfloss.com/article/556420/25-new-words-merriam-webster-adding-dictionary-2018
https://public.oed.com/blog/new-words-notes-september-2018/
https://wonderopolis.org/wonder/how-do-words-get-added-to-the-dictionary
https://www.oxforddictionaries.com/our-story/creating-dictionaries
https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/explore/how-many-words-are-there-in-the-english-language/https:/en.oxforddictionaries.com/explore/how-many-words-are-there-in-the-english-language/
https://englishlive.ef.com/blog/language-lab/many-words-english-language/
https://www.rd.com/culture/almost-extinct-words/
https://qz.com/790750/30-words-and-phrases-that-will-soon-disappear-from-american-english/
http://www.hongkiat.com/blog/dictionary-words-from-internet/
http://nws.merriam-webster.com/opendictionary/newword_display_recent.php
http://blog.dictionary.com/2015-november-new-words/
http://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/2015/08/new-words-update-manspreading-mic-drop/
http://www.marketwatch.com/story/10-bizarre-new-words-youll-now-find-in-the-dictionary-2015-11-10
https://www.theguardian.com/books/2011/aug/21/endangered-words-collins-dictionary
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2018/nov/16/words-deserve-fall-out-of-use-obscurity

https://www.news.com.au/technology/science/evolution/we-might-use-them-now-but-these-are-the-words-on-death-row-that-could-soon-become-extinct/news-story/cfd15f6cc5a5192e8bc45b140c831d28

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/11827287/The-top-ten-most-unexpected-words-added-to-the-online-Oxford-dictionary.html
https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/g25712934/new-dictionary-words/?slide=10
https://www.grammarly.com/blog/slang-words-2018/
https://www.latimes.com/books/jacketcopy/la-et-jc-icymi-dictionary-20160707-snap-story.html








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    Author R. Ann Siracusa

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