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THE DREADED NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION

1/3/2020

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THERE IS STILL TIME TO MAKE THOSE NEW YEAR'S RESOLTUIONS
Even though it's already January 3, there is still plenty of time to make the dreaded resolutions for 2020. We've only lost three days. But why bother? Statistics show that most [80%] of these promises to change something about our lives endure for only one month, and then peter out until everything reverts back to the status quo.
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                                                                                Cartoon Source: www.rusherrogers.com.au/new-years-resolutions
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IF YOU ARE SERIOUS ABOUT CHANGE
Adults can change behavior, but it takes a lot of conscious effort. Isn’t that why parents try to teach their children good habits when they’re young? Although I’ve often wondered why children pick up their parent’s bad habits in the blink of an eye, but never pick up the good ones, like brushing their teeth after every meal. Go figure!

Personally, I believe it’s a mistake to start out by announcing to the world that you are making some resolution or another; that this is what you are going to do. It’s easy to fall off the “Resolution Wagon”. Things become embarrassing when you have to admit you have failed, or to lie about it. Then to your friends and relatives you are both a failure and a liar. However, some people prefer that approach, and if it works for you, more power to it.

WHAT THE EXPERTS SAY
Not being an expert myself, I have to rely on others who claim to be. According to Daniel Wallen [www.lifehack.org/fail.html], writing about New Year’s Resolutions, “only 12% of you will ever experience the taste of victory. Sound bad? It is. 156 million people will probably give up on their resolution before you can say confetti." Wallen says there are a number of reasons we fail to carry out our resolutions, including:
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● Treating A Marathon Like A Sprint
● Not Believing In Yourself
● Being Too Much Of A Hurry
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● Putting The Cart Before The Horse
● Not Enjoying The Process
● Trying Too Hard
● Not Tracking Your Progress

​Photo source: carpedieminks.in/cart-beforehorse/
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● Too Much Thinking, Not Enough Doing
● Lacking Social Support
● You Know Your What, But Not Your Why.

​i.pinimg.com/overthinking - Photo source: https://www.pinterest.com/567664728010646445/
​My take on this advice is that individuals must let go of the “I want it all, and I want it NOW!” attitude and be serious and thoughtful about what they resolve to do, or give up doing the resolution thing, period. I mean, why set yourself up for failure? Don’t put pressure on yourself or let others do it to you.

Just as Wallen suggests setting goals, so does Dr. Shainna Ali, Ph.D., LMHC, writing in Psychology Today. [www.psychologytoday.com/new-years-resolutions] She indicates that although the reasons for failure to keep resolutions vary from person to person, there “are 4 common ways you are standing in the way of your success."
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● Your Goals Aren’t Clear
If you don’t know why don’ t know [honestly] why they are important to you or haven’t thought how achieving these goals would influence your life, you need to clarify the goals. Then go beyond by being sure your goals are specific, measurable, and realistic. You can't lose 100 pounds in a month.
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● You Feel Overwhelmed
You don’t know where to start. There can be pressure to hurry up and change from your environment, culture, loved ones, and even from yourself. Over time, the walls are beginning to close in on you, and can result in your quitting before you begin.
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● You Feel Discouraged
You may become impatient in the process. Perhaps you are not seeing signs of progress, or at least not as fast as you previously expected.
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​● You Are Not Ready To Change
Failure to thoroughly consider the corresponding what, when, where, and why may cause you to lack the ability to truly ask yourself if you are currently ready to make the necessary changes. That’s when we find every excuse under the sun to step away from our path.

​Dr. Ali writes, “The crucial component is tailoring tasks that align with who you are and where you wish to be.” Be true to yourself in setting your goals.                                                Source: galleryfunnygame.blogspot.com/
                                                                                                                                                                https://www.pinterest.com/pin/559009372472546215/?lp=true
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​TRY A DIFFERENT APPROACH
The resolution to lose weight is the most common New Year’s resolution. Instead, The Real Buzz Team [www.realbuzz.com/new-years-resolutions/] suggests some different kinds of resolutions I found intriguing. Most of them are quite feasible and sound like fun rather than undue pressure.
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●.Get Your Photo Taken In Five Interesting Places
● Learn A Decent Party Trick
● Break A Record
● Make A New Friend A Month
● Develop A Good Relationship With Your Body
● Learn Something You Never Learned As A Child
● Try A New Food Each Week
● Make The Usual Unusual
● Sort Out A Financial Worry
● Do Something Nice For Others Every Day
Cartoon by T. Sirrell
Photo source: www.tsirrell.com/asp_scripts/
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HAVE FUN WITH IT
My father’s Annual New Year’s Resolution was always giving up robbing banks. Not that he ever robbed a bank or thought about it, but he never had trouble keeping his resolution.

Most of us just have fun with the idea and come up with goofy resolutions that are not serious …
I hope.



​Diet and Weight Management Resolutions
https://holidappy.com/holidays/FunnyNewYearsResolutions
I will...
● Lose weight by hiding it somewhere you'll never find it.
● Gain enough weight to get on "The Biggest Loser."
● Buy new clothes big enough to account for next year's holidays.
● Start smoking to lose weight.
● Stop smoking. I'll worry about the fire later.
● Lose weight by inventing an anti-gravity machine.
● Lose weight by living on the moon.
● Stop buttering my doughnuts.
​
"Realistic" Resolutions
https://holidappy.com/holidays/FunnyNewYearsResolutions
I will...
● Make a resolution to not make any more New Year resolutions.

Cartoon by Mike Smith                                                                                                  Cartoon by Debbie Ridpath Ohi – Will Write for Chocolate                         Cartoon Source: santamariatimes.com/editorial-cartoon                                  Cartoon Source: http://inkygirl.com/wwfc/2007/1/18/new-years-resolutions.html  
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                                                                                                                                     Cartoon by Charles Saxon
                                                                                                       source: www.art.com/products/charles-saxon
● Watch more movie remakes.
● Go back to school … to avoid paying my student loans.
● Keep it to myself that I have trouble with authority when I'm being interviewed.
● Spend less than $1,825 on coffee at Starbucks this year.
● Claim all my pets as dependents on my taxes.
● Put more embarrassing items in random peoples carts while shopping at Wal-Mart.
● Squeeze the tube of toothpaste from the end and not the middle.

Technology-Related Resolutions
https://holidappy.com/holidays/FunnyNewYearsResolutions
I will...
● Watch more cute and cuddly kitten videos on YouTube.
● Check my work e-mail account at least once this year.
● Switch my username to “password” and my password to “username” to make each harder for hackers to figure out.
● Stop sending e-mails with complaints about the boss
● Always check who I am responding to before I press the “reply all” key.        Cartoon Source: trendingtalks.com/new-years-resolution
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● Watch less TV … in standard definition.
● Stop buying worthless junk on eBay—because QVC has better specials.
● Start using Facebook for something other than Farmville and stupid quizzes.
● Help kids stay safe by not texting on my cell phone while eating McDonald’s and speeding through crosswalks in school zones with a frost-covered windshield.
● Avoid fingertip soreness by learning to play Rock Band instead of a real guitar.
● Start a blog about how I would write more often if I had something important to write. Only make one blog entry and leave it published for years.
● Talk with a robot voice all the time.
​
Resolutions About Money and Finances
I will...
● Open a new credit card with a higher limit and pay off my old credit cards once and for all. And finally start going to the mall again.
● Save some money for a rainy day. That way I can shop online instead of having to go to an actual store.
● Keep better records throughout the year. That way I can listen to better music while I'm figuring my taxes.
● Look for investors for my "home office" business.
● Lower my bills by digging a hole to put them in.
● Avoid getting a divorce by practicing polygamy.
● Borrow things more often. Return them less often.
● Visit the grocery more often than restaurants, especially when free samples are being served.
● Stop throwing away money that could at least be burned for heat.

MY PERSONAL RESOLUTION for 2020
I resolve, In 2020, to pave at least One Mile of the “Road To Hell” with good intentions.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! LIVE LONG AND PROSPER!
Sources:
https://runt-of-the-web.com/funniest-new-years-resolutions
https://hellogiggles.com/lifestyle/15-funny-af-new-years-resolutions-to-make-you-smile-at-the-end-of-this-terrible-year/
https://www.realbuzz.com/articles-interests/festive-health-fitness/article/10-unusual-new-years-resolutions/
https://holidappy.com/holidays/FunnyNewYearsResolutions
https://bemethis.com/20-most-funny-new-years-resolutions-vs-realities-that-will-make-you-laugh/
https://www.rd.com/funny-stuff/16-new-years-resolution-cartoons/
https://www.buzzfeed.com/christopherhudspeth/21-hilarious-new-years-tweets-thatll-have-you-laughing-your
https://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/10-reasons-why-new-years-resolutions-fail.html
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/modern-mentality/201812/why-new-years-resolutions-fail

Cartoons
http://www.tsirrell.com/asp_scripts/print_image.asp?WebsiteID=25193&GalleryID=125595&MediaID=5306989&Print=0
https://santamariatimes.com/opinion/editorial/editorial-cartoon-new-year-s-resolution/article_150f1d63-0d8e-513d-9c2c-7231b6552231.html
https://www.rusherrogers.com.au/new-years-resolutions/11-new-years-resolution-cartoons-that-are-hilariously-spot-on-1-2/
http://trendingtalks.com/10-new-years-resolution-cartoons-which-is-hilariously-spot-on/
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/559009372472546215/?lp=true
https://www.art.com/products/p15063669530-sa-i6854172/charles-saxon-walter-am-i-a-new-year-s-resolution-new-yorker-cartoon.htm





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IO SATURNALIA: Did the Romans Invent Christmas?

12/20/2019

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DID THE ROMANS INVENT CHRISTMAS?
Of course they didn't invent Christmas, but similar to many facets of life in today’s western civilization, the Romans had a profound influence on the way Christians celebrate Christmas. We just can’t get away from those Roman guys, can we?

IN THE BEGINNING
The festival of Saturnalia began as a one-day farming ritual related to the end of harvest and the winter solstice. On that day, the agrarian population under Rome’s rule honored Saturn, the Roman god of agriculture, and offered gifts and sacrifices to the him. The time of its origin is unknown, but Saturnalia predates the birth of Christ, and the tradition followed the Romans throughout the Roman Empire.

The celebration may have taken on the name Saturnalia when the Temple of Saturn was dedicated in Rome in around 498 BC. The anniversary of the dedication was commemorated on December 17, and is believed to be the source of many of the current Christmas traditions.

The Temple of Saturn, Rome. - Photo Credit: stefano.pellicciari/Fotolia
 ▼Photo Source: www.britannica.com/Saturnalia-Roman
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THE MOST POPULAR ROMAN HOLIDAY
Whenever the festival began, by 131 BC this public holiday -- a time for feasting, goodwill, and generosity to the poor and also for drinking, dancing, nudity, and general bacchanal -- had become the most popular holiday on the Roman (Julian) calendar. The gala had been expanded into a week-long event beginning December 17 and ending on December 23. The date of winter solstice on the Julian calendar was December 25.

Augustus Caesar, who ruled from 27 BC to 14 AD, reduced the festivities to three days because it interfered with working days. Later, Emperor Caligula (37 to 41 AD) extended it to five days. By the 5th century the gala lasted two weeks, although different sources identify different numbers of days.
                                                                                                       Photo source:  historyextra.com/romans-celebrate-christmas/ ▼
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​According to Macrobius, a well-known Roman author (370-430 AD), Saturnalia represented the merging of three winter festivals over several centuries.
     The Day of Saturn (Saturnalia) originally December 17;
    The Festival of Opalia, goddess of abundance and fruits of the earth (who was also Saturn’s wife and sister); and
     A feast day celebrating the shortest day, called Brumalia by the Romans, which coincided with the solstice.

Because Saturnalia was truly a festival of the people, not just the upper crust, there were plenty of reasons why the holiday was so popular. Some unique things occurred.
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● Nobody worked for the entire week of Saturnalia. Courts, shops, schools, public offices were all closed and no one did business during the holiday.

● Most of the Roman’s strict rules went out the window and it was a time of role reversal in terms of the aristocracy and the common Romans, servants, and slaves. A week of "equality". The festival reflects the contradictory nature of the deity Saturn himself; joyful and carefree, but also threatening and dangerous. During this week, slaves and servants could insult the boss without repercussions. They sat at the tables for a huge banquet while their masters served them and gave them gifts.
Pilleum cap of the freed slaves.
 ▼ Photo source: somathread.ning.com/saturnalian-pileus
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● People would wear a cap of freedom – the pilleum – which was usually worn by slaves who had been awarded their freedom, to symbolize that they were free during the Saturnalia.
​
● It was the Romans’ mid-winter holiday of feasting, drinking, singing in the street naked, dancing, clapping hands, making noise, and debauchery. An orgy, so to speak. Who doesn't love an orgy?
[Actually, there were those, particularly aristocracy and scholars, who didn't love it.]
                                                                                                Photo source: jeremyvarner.com/saturnalia/ ▼
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● Activities forbidden to the plebeians were permitted such as gambling in public, bobbing for corks in ice water, trivia games, chariot racing, wearing weird or colorful clothing or nothing at all, and so on.

● Even the conservatively clothed aristocracy dressed in brightly colored fabrics such as red, purple and gold. This outfit was called the synthesis, meaning they put together whatever clothes they wanted. And no togas. This was a time for relaxation. ▼
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● People would feast in their homes. According to the historian Livy, by 217 BC there was also a huge public feast at the oldest temple in Rome, the Temple of Saturn. Macrobius confirms that the rowdy participants would spill out onto the street, shouting, “Io Saturnalia!” or “Io, Io, Io!” [“Io” is pronounced like yō.]
 Photo source: historyextra.com/romans-celebrate-Christmas/
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Photo Source: reason.com/happy-saturnalia-2019/
THE LORD OF MISRULE
A part of the festivities particularly popular in many households was the selection of a mock king. The mock king, or Saturnalicius princeps, got to run around the house for a week, giving everyone commands and a hard time. The mock king was also called The Lord of Misrule and his job was to make mischief during the week.
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The person who received this honor was selected by chance. A small coin was baked into a cake and whomever was served the piece of cake with the coin inside was deemed the Lord of Misrule. Once chosen, this person would:
    ●Insult guests!
    ●Wear crazy clothing!
    ●Chase people around the house!
    ●Plan scandalous party entertainment!

I found no indication that the household Lord of Misrule took his antics outside of the household. However, because of the general atmosphere, I imagine it happened often.
Photo Source: solascendans.com/lord-of-misrule/

GIFT GIVING
The Christmas tradition of giving gifts arises, in part, from Saturnalia. December 19 was the Sigillaria, the Roman day of giving gifts. Saturnalia was more about a change in attitudes rather than giving gifts. 

​Because the whole spirit of the celebration was generosity and equality in the eyes of God, the value of the gifts was also reversed in terms of social status. Pottery and wax figurines called sigillaria were made for this day. In truth, the gifts given were both very expensive or in the nature of gag-gifts, but the original spirit of the day was that token gifts of low intrinsic value inversely meant the giver considered the friendship as being very dear and high quality. Children received toys as gifts.
Pottery & bronze figurines 3rd century BC to 1st century AD / Photo source: alison-morton.com/saturnalia

Gifts might include white candles, named cerei, which signified the increase of light after the solstice. This practice of gift giving can also be looked at like sending greeting cards.

However, December 19 was not the only time people gave gifts during Saturnalia, and in some households, guests and family members received gifts after the feast in which slaves had shared.

DECORATIONS
The colors of Saturnalia were green and gold, and the Romans decorated their homes with evergreen wreaths, garlands made of pine branches, mistletoe, and holly. Gold decorations in the traditional shapes of the sun and stars, pinecones, nuts, acorns, or animals, were added.  Evergreen branches signified the continuation of life through the winter and the prospect of the coming of spring.
Photo source: legionarybooks.blogspot.com/saturnalia                                            Photo Source: eaglesanddragonspublishing.com/io-saturnalia

CANDLES
The Romans had a long tradition of lighting candles (wax tapers) and torches as part of their ceremonies. Whether or not this practice derived from an old prophecy, which bade the earliest inhabitants of Latium to “send heads to Hades and to Saturn”, no one knows for sure. However, the ancient Latins interpreted this to mean human sacrifices. According to legend, Hercules suggested that the phrase meant using lights (phos means “light” or “man” according to accent) and not human heads. Apparently they accepted that mythical advice and instead lit candles to honor Saturn.
  
From the beginning of Christianity, fire and light serve as symbols of the divine nature and the divine presence. Christ is the true Light. Light represents the purifying presence of god. It would not be a stretch for the new Christians to adopt the idea of candles in their services, but according to Wikipedia, “There is no evidence of any ceremonial use of lights in Christian worship during its first two centuries.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ceremonial_use_of_lights
 
HOW DID SATURNALIA BECOME CHRISTMAS?
One didn't become the other, but the process of religious syncretism blended the old pagan rituals from the celebration of Saturn with the religious beliefs of the new Christianity, resulting in a new religious tradition.

December 25 is celebrated by the Christian religions as the day Jesus Christ was born. In English, the word Christmas is derived from old English Christ Mass. The actual date of the Christ child’s birth is unknown, and many historians and theologians believe his birth more likely occurred in the spring. Some people use that fact to make strange arguments about the holiday, but that is all rhetoric.

Whether or not Christ was born on December 25, this is the date the Christian religion has chosen to celebrate the birthday. It’s similar to having your birthday party on Saturday, when your real birthday is Thursday.
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Photo source: www.christianity.com/1st-recorded-celebration-of-christmas​
During the first 300 or so years of Christianity, the Baptism of Christ, not his birth, was considered more important and was celebrated on January 6, the Epiphany. The first known celebration of Christmas on December 25 was in 336 AD during the time of the Roman Emperor Constantine, the first Christian Roman Emperor. At that time the day had no official status. About fifteen years later (350 AD), Pope Julius I declared December 25 as the official date of Christmas. It wasn’t until 529 AD that Emperor Justinian made Christmas a civic holiday.
December 25 obviously coincides with the pagan festival of Saturnalia. One popular interpretation is that by selecting this date, religious leaders hoped to convert the pagan masses to Christianity by promising them that they could continue to celebrate the Saturnalia more or less the way it had always been, as Christians. Thus, early Christmas holidays were celebrated by drinking, sexual indulgence, singing naked in the streets, a precursor of modern caroling. 

Another major consideration was the “concept in Judaism that link the time of the deaths of prophets being linked to their conception or birth. From this, early ecclesiastical number-crunchers extrapolated that the nine months of Mary’s pregnancy following the Annunciation on March 25th would produce a December 25th date for the birth of Christ.” https://www.historytoday.com
Over time the celebrations took on a Christian theme and theology but maintained the same spirit as a time of year for peace on earth, equality for all, good will towards man, and generosity for all. Thus, Saturnalia eventually evolved into Christmas.

If you are Christian - MERRY CHRISTMAS!
If you are not - HAPPY HOLIDAYS and GOOD WILL and HONOR to your own religious days

​Sources
https://www.wikihow.com/Celebrate-Saturnalia
https://www.naturalnavigator.com/news/2008/11/saturnalia-christmas-and-common-sense/
https://museumhack.com/saturnalia-christmas/
https://www.historyextra.com/period/roman/how-did-the-romans-celebrate-christmas/
https://www.creativejeffrey.com/creative/innovative_christmas.phphttps:/www.britannica.com/topic/feast-religion/Types-and-kinds-of-feasts-and-festivals
http://jeremyvarner.com/blog/2016/12/history-of-the-holidays-saturnalia/
https://www.historytoday.com/archive/did-romans-invent-christmas
https://www.simpletoremember.com/vitals/Christmas_TheRealStory.htm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5uG6zaDaIM
https://theluminessence.wordpress.com/2017/12/19/a-saturnalia-ritual/
/mahttps://www.lnstar.com/mallin-areas/xmas-not-first-choice.htm
https://travelingboy.com/travel/saturnalia-history-christmas/
https://alison-morton.com/2018/12/16/saturnalia-serious-roman-festival-or-free-for-all/
https://somathread.ning.com/groups/the-shrine-of-eris/forum/the-saturnalian-pileus
https://www.wikiwand.com/en/Pileus_(hat)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ceremonial_use_of_lights
https://www.britannica.com/topic/Saturnalia-Roman-festivalhttps://www.britannica.com/topic/Saturnalia-Roman-festival 
{This site has wonderful drawings of structures in the Roman forum]
 







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The Tradition of the Christmas colors

12/13/2019

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LOST IN THE MISTS OF TIME
Like so many other traditions, the exact origins of red and green as the colors of Christmas are lost in time. Despite a variety of theories, it is clear the tradition didn’t evolve as part of the Christian religion, but can be traced to the ancient Celtic peoples who commemorated different holidays, usually related to the change of seasons, with different colors.

They venerated the green holly with red berries for being evergreen during the cold winter and believed the plant was meant to keep the world beautiful even in the winter. Decorating their homes with holly for the winter solstice celebrations was believed to protect them and bring good luck in the coming year. Celtic peoples as well as many other pagan religions celebrated winter with evergreens.
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Even the Romans used Fir Trees to decorate their temples at the festival of Saturnalia celebrated at What is now Christmas time.
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WHEN WAS CHRIST BORN?
Most Christians understand that Christ was not born on what we now call December 25th. The scriptures don’t identify the season although there are indicators that he may have been born in the spring time because Luke references sheep grazing in the fields, which only happened in warmer months.
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The birth of Jesus was not celebrated until the fourth century AD. In that era, the Roman scholar Hippolytus projected the birth of Christ at a time of year near the winter solstice. The first recorded commemoration of Christmas was 336 AD in the time of Roman Emperor Constantine, the first Christian emperor, and was used as a way to discourage Christians from participating in pagan winter solstice rites.

THE MIDDLE AGES
During the Middle Ages, after the fall of Rome, not many people celebrated Christmas. However, during this period many Celtic and other pagan traditions and celebrations were subsumed by Christian beliefs and practices.
​
After a month of fasting (Advent) and preparation, the Christmas festivities lasted for 12 days, from Christmas to January 6 (Epiphany). Replicating the pagan traditions, “inversions of order occurred across medieval society around Christmas. One of the most colorful was the election of a boy bishop, who presided over processions and church ritual on the Feast of the Holy Innocents (28 December).

In a surviving example of a boy bishop’s sermon, the boy bishop wishes that all his schoolteachers would end up on the gallows at Tyburn. One chronicle records how, at the Abbey of St Gall in the 10th century, King Conrad tried to distract the procession of the boys by strewing apples down the processional route; the boys were, however, so disciplined that not an apple was touched.”
https://www.historyextra.com/medieval-christmas
 
ROOD SCREENS

Dr. Spike Bucklow of the University of Cambridge, who studied medieval church art, hypothesizes that the uses of green and red started with the 14th century Rood Screen.

That was a new one. I didn’t know that Rood Screens are wooden structures that stand in a church between the nave and the chancel, partitions installed in churches to separate the congregation from the priest and the altar.
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These screens were carved in the Middle Ages, richly decorated with images of saints or local donors, and followed a very consistent color scheme: alternating zones of red and green. The use of those colors related to the pigments available for decorating the screens, and that the tradition of pairing the two colors at Christmas came from that tradition.
​◄15th century rood screen, Holy Trinity Church, in Torbryan, ​Devon, southwestern England
Photo source: http://www.thehistoryblog.com/archives/26607

SIGNIFICANCE OF GREEN AND RED
Regardless of the origins, each of the colors has accumulated traditional beliefs which still predominates today.
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GREEN
​● Green signifies life - Plants are green because they depend on chlorophyll for life. Thus, to many societies the color green symbolizes life, fertility, and the rebirth of life after winter. About two hundred years before the birth of Christ mistletoe was used by the Druids to celebrate the coming of winter. Green is an ancient reminder that winter doesn’t last forever.

● Christian belief - The color green is a natural representation of eternal life, specifically the evergreen tree and how it survives through the winter season. That’s why, in Christian belief, green represents the eternal life that Jesus Christ offers.
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● Green in the Middle Ages – During this period, green represented love and fertility, and brides often wore green on their wedding day.
◄Pagan Wedding Dress: Photo source: https://wiccanspells.info/wiccan-pagan-articles/4-beautiful-pagan-wedding-dress-styles/

​                                                                                  McMillian Education Poster – Painting by unknown 20th century artist of a Miracle Play
                                                                                               Photo source: https://bookpalace.com/acatalog/info_20thMiraclePlLL.html  ▼
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● Paradise or Miracle Plays of the 14th century – On Christmas eve these plays were performed to teach Bible stories to people who couldn’t read -- the vast majority.

​​The tradition was to present the Paradise Play, the story of Adam and Eve and the Garden of Eden. The Paradise Tree within the garden was normally a pine tree with red apples tied to it. That inspired people to decorate their homes with evergreen bows and decorating with red apples.
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RED
● Red Berries signify fertility and new life – Holly is one of the plants that remains green during the winter and it happens to have red barriers. Berries, because they carry the seeds for new plants, could be symbolic of fertility and new life. Mistletoe has green berries. Go figure. 
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● Christian belief - The color red symbolizes the blood of Jesus that he shed to save mankind.

​● Paradise or Miracle Plays of the 14th century – The association of red with these play comes from the story of the apple tree and the apples tied to the evergreen.
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● Red is the color a Bishop's robes - St. Nicholas, as a bishop, would have worn red. It is a possible connection to the Santa Claus uniform.

Coca-Cola started using a Santa image in its advertising in 1931. Later, when they hired artist Haddon Sundblom to draw their Santa Claus ads, his image of the jolly elf bestowed on Santa Claus by western culture became that created by Coca-Cola.
                                                           The first Coca-Cola Santa advertisement – 1931
                                        http://www.adbranch.com/coca-cola-santa-claus-1931-1949/

Sources:
https://www.history.com/news/who-was-st-nicholas
https://www.coca-colacompany.com/stories/coke-lore-santa-claus
http://www.whychristmas.com/customs/colors-of-christmas.shtml
http://www.whychristmas.com/customs/25th.shtml
http://www.christmaslore.com/the_true_meaning_behind_the_christmas_colors.htm
https://suite.io/nicole-skutelnik/12f72k3
http://www.sensationalcolor.com/liveinfullcolor/how-red-and-green-became-the-colors-of-christmas/
https://www.mysciencework.com/omniscience/medieval-roots-for-our-christmas-colors-the-meaning-of-red-green
http://www.cam.ac.uk/research/news/who-colour-coded-christmas
http://christianity.about.com/od/christmas/
https://www.rd.com/culture/christmas-colors-green-red/
https://random-times.com/2018/12/09/9-the-ancient-origins-of-christmas-tree/
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PUT OUT THE LIGHTS AND CRY: Diner Speak

12/6/2019

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In days gone by my family used to race motorcycles in the High Mojave Desert. Almost every weekend we would make the trip to various locations where the races were held. Ah, the memories of District 37 and the View Finders, the riding club we belonged to. 

Along the way we stopped at various diners and cafes to grab a bite to eat either going or returning home. You know…the hole-in-the-wall family operations that most likely don’t exist in the 21st century. Maybe in a very small town somewhere. They were fun because the waitress would call out the order to the cook using “Diner language.” My kids thought that was a hoot would always try to guess what was being ordered.

Our favorite was Charlie’s Place located between Red Mountain and Trona, CA. The establishment was more of a bar than a diner, located out in the boonies where desert races were held. Nothing but rocks and desert for miles in any direction.
                                           Charlie's Place                                        Desert around Trona, CA              
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Years after we stopped going there, it was renamed the Wagon Wheel and moved to another other location. The site, which is now a BLM camping area, is still called Charlie’s Place.

BURN ONE WITH FROG STICKS
As I sifted through more than a couple hundred of these diner-speak phrases, I wondered how many of them my grandchildren would understand. I’ve listed fifty+ here. Find the favorites for your family and call them out when served. Or make up a “Jeopardy” type game to guess the food from the name.

Here is a sample. Some of the terms are the dishes themselves, others are directions regarding preparation. See how many you can match.

01. A spot with a twist = Cup of tea with lemon
02. ▼ Adam and Eve on a raft = Two poached eggs on toast
03. Adam and Eve blindfolded with sneeze ▲ = Two poached eggs on toast surrounded by bacon & peppered.
04. Add Hail to the MD = Put ice in the Dr. Pepper
05. ▼All hot = A baked potato
06. All Hot, Tip Toe thru Wisconsin ▲ = Baked Potato with cheese sprinkled on top
https://www.easycheesyvegetarian.com/how-to-make-perfect-baked-potato/

07. Axle grease/skid grease/cow paste = Butter
08. ▼Angels on Horseback = Oysters rolled in bacon and served on toast
09. Blowout Patches with Axle Grease and Vermont ▲= Pancakes with butter and syrup
10. Baby juice/moo juice/cow juice/Sweet Alice = Milk
11. Belch water/balloon water = Seltzer or soda water
12. Baled Hay = Shreaded Wheat
13. Battle Creek in a bowl = Corn Flakes in a bowl
14. Biddy Board = French toast
15. Bloodhound in the Hay = A hot dog with sauerkraut
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16. Bossy in a bowl = Beef stew
17. Burn one = Put a hamburger on the grill
18. Burn one with frog sticks = Hamburger and fries
19. Burn one, take it through the garden and pin a rose on it = A hamburger with lettuce, tomato and onion
20. ▼Burn the British = A toasted English muffin
21. Cowboy with Spurs = Western Omelet with potatoes ▲
22. Drag one through Georgia = Coca-Cola with chocolate syrup
23. Drag Wimpy through Wisconsin = Hamburger with cheese
24. Draw one in the dark = A cup of black coffee
25. Drown the Kids = Boiled Eggs
26. ▼Eve with a moldy lid = Apple pie with cheese
​28. First lady = Spareribs ▲
29. In the alley = A side dish
30. First Lady with Idaho Cakes in the alley = Ribs with Hash brown Patties on the side
31. Frog sticks = French fries
32. Fry two and let the sun shine = Two eggs sunny side up or eggs which have not been
      flipped over.
33. ▼Heart Attack on Rack = Biscuits and gravy
34. Hounds on an Island ▲= Franks and beans
https://parade.com/891446/pambeth/this-franks-and-beans-recipe-tastes-like-childhood-in-casserole-form

​35. Houseboat = A banana split
36. Looseners = Prunes
37. Maiden's delight = Cherries
38. Mouse Trap = Grilled Cheese Sandwich
39. Noah's boy on dough = A ham sandwich
40. Noah's boy with Murphy carrying a wreath = ham and potatoes with cabbage
41. Pair of drawers = Two cups of coffee
42. Put out the lights and cry = Liver and onions
43. Hockey puck = A hamburger, well done
44. Hold the grass / keep off the grass = A sandwich without lettuce|
45. Hot Blonde in the Sand = Coffee with cream and sugar
46. Two Cows, make them cry = Two hamburgers with onions
47. Whiskey Down with Skid Grease = Rye toast with butter
48. Wreck 'em = Scrambled eggs

PUT LEGS ON IT
Some of the diner slang is more about actions than the kind of food. These terms add significantly to the fun of the "language".
Burn one = Put a hamburger on the grill
Nuke it = Microwave
Cremate it or Kill it = cook well-done
Drop = Start cooking the accompanied item; e.g. “The mussels are almost done, better drop the calamari.”
Give It Wings = Serve quickly
On a Rail or On the Fly = Something needed quickly, like yesterday
Turn & Burn = Turn a table quickly (usually because there is a long waiting list for tables).
Pump it out = Getting food out quickly
Put legs on it = A take out item
In the alley = A side dish

HAVE FUN WITH IT!
Sources:
https://www.tasteofhome.com/collection/diner-lingo/
http://www.meandmycaptain.com/2014/01/adam-eve/
http://blog.etundra.com/food-service/glossary-restaurant-terms/
https://www.dametown.com/words-for-women-get-the-hang-of-30s-slang/
http://mentalfloss.com/article/31493/understanding-diner-lingo-55-phrases-get-you-started
http://www.jitterbuzz.com/diners.html
https://www.metv.com/quiz/do-you-know-your-breakfast-diner-lingo
https://www.thrillist.com/eat/nation/diner-slang-what-does-diner-lingo-mean
https://www.rd.com/food/phrases-only-hear-50s-diner/
​https://www.facebook.com/AMADistrict37/


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AYE-AYE, CAPTAIN

11/29/2019

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You never know when you’re going to run onto something new and surprising. I was doing due diligence on a blog about homophones and, of course, one of the most common is the noun eye, the pronoun I, and aye, meaning yes.

​Everyone knows that last one, I thought. I intended to leave it out, but when I went to my dictionaries online, I found something I’d never heard of before.
Photo source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jHs5POy8-8Y
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AND YOU THINK YOU WERE SURPRISED!
Meet the Aye-aye!

When the Aye-aye was discovered in the early 1800s, scientists thought it was an unusual type of large rodent related to the squirrel because the aye-aye’s incisors grow continuously throughout life like a rodent.

Subsequently, the animal was believed to have become extinct. Rediscovered in 1957, scientists decided it was a rare type of lemur found only in remote locations in the dense, tropical rainforests Madagascar’s eastern coast. The nocturnal primate, now, has come into its own and is recognized as the only species in its own taxonomic family: Daubentoniidae aye-aye

The creature is highly endangered in Madagascar and, in the United States, there are only 24 living in seven zoos.YOU AIN’T NO BEAUTY QUEEN YOURSELFAbout a year ago, in September 13, 2018, the Denver Post ran this headline.
     “Denver Zoo welcomes rare, ugly ‘Omen of Evil’ baby animal into its flock – Tonks, the aye-aye,
     is the newest member of one of the rarest animal species in the world.”

Not a complimentary introduction to the world but others, along with the Denver Post, identify the aye-aye as one of the ugliest animals in existence, including native groups in Madagascar who consider sighting an aye-aye as an omen of evil.  Based on the photographs following, I understand the reaction.
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​Photo Credit: Denver Zoo  (Newborn Tonka)                                Photo Credit: Duke Lemur Center                                        Photo Credit:  Valery Krukovets 
Photo Source: www.denverpost.com/2018/09/tonks-aye-aye/     Photo Source: https://www.factzoo.com/           Photo Source: petrovich7777.artstation.com/projects
Newborn Tonka and the others are definitely not beauty queens. Evil Omens? Who knows? As they get larger, they can take some cute pictures.
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    This is Stan in costume.                                      This is Agatha, who was named after Agatha Christi 
Vital Statistics
Physically, the aye-aye is a distinctive animal with some unusual characteristics, including a long, bony middle finger used to pry insects from tree trunks. They serve a biological niche similar to that of woodpeckers.
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Photo Credit: David Haring
Photo Source: https://www.sciencenews.org/article/fossil-lemur-aye-aye-bat-madagascar
Called percussion foragers, the aye-aye uses its middle finger to tap on wood as it walks along a branch, listening for the movement of larvae hidden inside. If they hear movement, they use their rodent-like incisors to gnaw into the bark exposing the larvae and then insert their elongated middle finger to extract the larvae. They are the only primates thought to use echolocation to find prey.

The fur is long, woolly, and dark brown in color. The combination of bushy tail and woolly fur gives the animal a sort of unkempt, shaggy appearance. Aye-ayes have large, naked, mobile ears, a muzzle that is shorter than that of most lemurs and large protruding eyes with yellowish brown irises adapted to its nocturnal life style.

Color:             Black, dark brown
Skin Type:     Fur
Size:               12 to 16” in length plus a bushy take extending another 18 to 22
Weight:          4 to 6 pounds
Top speed:    20 miles per hour
Life span:      23 years

The aye-aye is a solitary animal and lives alone unless it is a mother with a baby or a mating pair. Females take care of their babies, carrying them on her back until they are 13 months.

Despite being loaners, they interact peacefully with one another (except during the mating season) and they hardly ever defend their territory by fighting. The aye-aye marks its territory with the scent glands on its cheeks and neck. The scent repels intruders.

ENDANGERED EXISTENCE
In Madagascar it is believed that there is an “evil spirit” within the animal and that an aye-aye can curse a person by pointing at them with its unique finger. This led to many of them being killed on sight. The loss of habitat and hunting are the main threats to the survival of the aye-aye on this large island.
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Sources:
https://a-z-animals.com/animals/aye-aye/
https://animaldiversity.org/accounts/Daubentoniidae/
https://www.denverpost.com/2018/09/13/denver-zoo-baby-tonks-aye-aye/
https://www.sciencefocus.com/nature/what-is-an-aye-aye/
https://www.boredpanda.com/unusual-animals/?utm_source=bing&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic
https://petrovich7777.artstation.com/projects/JqgoA?album_id=634484
https://www.factzoo.com/worlds-ugliest-animals.html
 https://www.sciencenews.org/article/fossil-lemur-aye-aye-bat-madagascar
https://lemur.duke.edu/discover/meet-the-lemurs/aye-aye/
https://psmag.com/social-justice/this-lemur-is-not-a-demon-but-man-that-finger-is-creepy
https://www.zooborns.com/zooborns/aye-aye/




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Being Grateful Is Good For You

11/15/2019

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BEING THANKFUL IS A FEELING - BEING GRATEFUL IS AN ACTION.
Live out your gratitude every day through the small things you do, including expression your feelings of gratefulness.
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Besides being good for others, experts and studies tell us practicing gratefulness in our lives is good for us and the benefits can be life-altering. Unfortunately, human beings are not hardwired to be grateful. We have to work at it and practice a lot.

Dr. Robert Emmons, author of” "Thanks! How Practicing Gratitude Can Make You
​                                                   Happier” says it’s good for us in the following ways.

● Gratitude makes us feel more gratitude.
While in a grateful mood, we will feel gratitude more frequently, when we do feel gratitude it will be more intense and held for longer, and we will feel gratitude for more things at the same time. In five words – gratitude triggers positive feedback loops.
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◄ Gratitude makes us happier.
► Gratitude makes people like us.
Outwardly showing gratitude makes us nicer, more trusting, more social, and more appreciative. As a result, it helps us make more friends and deepen existing relationships. We’re nicer to be around.
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◄Gratitude makes us healthier and
​    sleep better.​
►Gratitude boosts your career.
Gratitude makes you a more effective manager, helps you network, improves your decision making, increases your productivity, and helps you get mentors and protégés. As a result, gratitude helps you achieve your career goals, as well as making your workplace a more enjoyable place to be.
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◄Gratitude increases your energy level. ►Gratitude makes us more optimistic.
Gratitude is strongly correlated with optimism. Optimism in turn makes us happier, improves our health, and has been shown to increase lifespan by as much as a few years. 
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◄ Gratitude makes us less self-centered.
Some people spend way too much time thinking about themselves, and too little thinking about others. As gratitude and compassion practices develop, you may feel the urge to help others.
​►Gratitude reduces materialism.
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Materialism is strongly correlated with reduced well-being and increased rates of mental disorder. There’s nothing wrong with wanting more. The problem with materialism is that it makes people feel less competent, reduces feelings of relatedness and gratitude, reduces their ability to appreciate and enjoy the good in life, generates negative emotions, and makes them more self-centered.
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​◄Gratitude increases self-esteem.
Imagine a world where no one helps you. Despite your asking and pleading, no one helps you. Now imagine a world where many people help you all of the time for no other reason than that they like you. In which world do you think you would have more self-esteem? Gratitude helps to create a world like that. How does gratitude create a more supportive social dynamic?
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◄Gratitude makes our memories happier.
Our memories are who we are, and they are not set in stone. Memories of events, people, everything we experience can change over time. We can remember things as being worse than they actually were, as being longer or shorter, as being funnier, people as being kinder or crueler, as being more or less interesting, etc. Experiencing gratitude in the present makes us more likely to remember positive memories. Also, it can mutate
                                             some of the neutral or even negative memories into positive ones​
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◄ Gratitude increases spiritualism
Spiritual transcendence is highly correlated with feelings of gratitude. That is – the more spiritual you are, the more likely you are to be grateful. This is for two reasons: 1) All major religions espouse gratitude as a virtue, and 2) Spirituality spontaneously gives rise to
                                            grateful behavior.
Photo source: http://gregburdine.com/spiritual-growth
PAY IT FORWARD
The list goes on and on, but you get the idea. In fact, living out your gratitude does just about everything from making you look better and more inclined to exercise to washing your underwear (well, almost that).
​
Gratitude helps us realize what we have, and awareness of what we're grateful may reduce the tendency to want more all the time. Notice your everyday world from the viewpoint of gratitude. It’s astounding the good things we take for granted, and the not-so-good things we focus on. So be thankful on Thanksgiving for all the wonderful things in this world, and even some of the not-so-wonderful. Be grateful every day you live and in the way you live, and things will be better than ever.
□
HAPPY TURKEY DAY!
Sources:
https://thepeacefulyogini.wordpress.com/2014/12/20/gift-it-forward-pay-it-forward-this-holiday-season/
https://www.unstuck.com/gratitude/
https://www.happierhuman.com/benefits-of-gratitude/
https://gratefulness.org/resource/what-is-gratitude/
https://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/a45386/gratitude-lists-dont-work/
https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/what_parents_neglect_to_teach_about_gratitude
ww.google.com/search?q=difference+between+thankful+and+grateful&oq=Difference+between+thankful+&aqs=chrome.0.0j69i57j0l4.11044j0j8&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8Z
https://www.theodysseyonline.com/difference-thankful-grateful
https://culturedindividuals.wordpress.com/2012/09/13/materialism-agree-disagree-or-what/
http://www.simonandschuster.com/books/A-Charlie-Brown-Thanksgiving/Charles-M-Schulz/Peanuts/9781481468053
http://clipart-library.com/kindness-cliparts.html
https://www.saba.com/blog  The Science of Praise: A Manager’s Guide To Giving Effective Employee Praise

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VETERANS DAY: A Time for Reflection

11/8/2019

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Yay! Veterans Day, November 11, is coming. A day off! No Mail! We get to wear red poppies, wave flags, and go to a parade!
​
Many American tend to think of Veterans Day as just another day off. Or, if you don't have a holiday, it may be just another day when the mail isn't delivered.
​
That's too bad, because it should be a day of reflection and thanks to the multitude of armed services veterans, and their families, who have kept our country "the land of the free, and the home of the brave."
Don't confuse it with Memorial Day, which honors those service men and women who have died in the service of their country. This day honors everyone who has served.
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Source of Photos: inthesetimes.com/veterans_day
Photo credit: U.S. Air Force / Flickr
HISTORY
Nothing is easy when it involves the federal government.

US President Woodrow Wilson first proclaimed Armistice Day for November 11, 1919, one year after the armistice between the Allied nations and Germany went into effect on the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month and brought to a halt the actual fighting in WW I. The Treaty of Versailles was signed seven months later, on June 28, 1919.

I was surprised to read that Congress didn't officially recognize the end of WW I until June 4, 1926. It's hard for me to envision signing the treaty without acknowledging the end of the war. However, in the same resolution, Congress requested President Coolidge to proclaim November 11 as a national holiday. This is the same day celebrated in other
parts of the world as Remembrance Day, Armistice Day, Victory in Europe Day, and other names.

An act approved in May 13, 1938, made the 11th of November a legal federal holiday, known as "Armistice Day", dedicated to the veterans of WW I and the cause of world peace.

Something as non-partisan/non-controversial as this took almost ten years. No wonder we're in trouble.

Then, on June 1, 1954, Congress approved legislation changing the name from Armistice Day to Veterans Day, a holiday which honors of the veterans of all wars, not just WW I, and celebrated on October 25. The first Veterans Day was celebrated on October 25, 1971. Confusion ensued. No one was happy.

On September 20, 1975, President Gerald Ford signed a law which returned Veterans Day to the original date of November 11, beginning in 1978.

Sigh of relief. This pleased just about everyone, although I used to wonder why my employer gave us a union-negotiated holiday on October 25, when the official holiday was November 11. Now I understand.

Hopefully, everything is settled for a while. And it pleases me that Veterans Day hasn't been moved from the specific date. That's not an accident. The proponents wanted to preserve the significance of November 11 and to focus attention on the purpose of Veterans Day.

A TIME FOR REFLECTION AND THANKS
As Senator Mike Johanns said,
     "Nothing we can do in Congress will ever fully return the favor of those who have given so much for America.  But we must do all we can to honor them.  All Americans share in the responsibility of caring for our veterans who have defended our freedom.
     Fewer causes are so imperative or so noble.  This Veterans Day, we remember the service to our brave men and women in uniform.  We thank them for their sacrifice and for their service."

Rory Fanning inthesetimes.com/veterans_day sends this message.
     “Many veterans enlisted in the military thinking that they were indeed serving a noble cause, and it's no lie to say that they fought with valor for their brothers and sisters to their left and right. Unfortunately, good intentions at this stage are no substitute for good politics. What they really want is not to be thanked for their service, but wants politicians to stop sending young soldiers off to die.”
​
THANK YOU TO THOSE MEN AND WOMEN, AND THEIR FAMILIES, WHO HAVE SERVED IN THE PAST AND TO THOSE WHO CONTINUE TO SERVE AND PROTECT OUR FREEDOM!
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Marine Corps War Memorial For the Marine dead of all wars,
​ and their comrades of other services who fell fighting beside them.
Unveiled November 10, 1954
Designed by Felix de Weldon (sculptor)
Horace W. Peaslee (architect)
Photo source: https://inthesetimes.com/article/17337/veterans_day_stop_thanking_troops
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DO YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO YOUR OPINION?

11/1/2019

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Photo source: www.inc.com/respectfully-disagree-with-someone.html

“The greatest deception men suffer is their own opinions.”
~Leonardo da Vinci
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WHAT IS AN OPINION?
If you look the word up in the dictionary, you will find the definitions along this line, stating that an opinion is:

● A view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge.
● An estimation of the quality or worth of someone or something
● The beliefs or views of a large number/ majority of people about something; a generally held view.
● A belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge
● A formal expression (as by a judge) of legal principles upon which a legal decision is based.
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You would think these are fairly easy concepts to understand. The unsettling part of this discussion is this:
“Most human beings believe their opinions are facts.” Because they believe it, that makes it so.                                                                                 "Make it sew!"►                    
“I HAVE A RIGHT TO MY OPINION.”
This is a phrase most people have used at one time or another, and sometimes too often. I doubt that most us have ever thought in depth about what it means.
The statement “I have the right to my opinion” means that “no one can stop me from thinking, observing, and drawing conclusions about anything.”
                                                                                                                   
Having the “right” to either have opinions or stopping people from having them is a moot point. In fact, no one can prevent another person from forming views about the world around them -- short of getting into medical and/or psychological interventions or serious violence.

So, sure. You have the right to your opinion … but keep in mind that “rights” are defined by the duties to which they give rise. When you claim a “right” to something, ask yourself what duties this right is supposed to impose on others.
medium.com/@neallwebster/
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“I AM ENTITLED TO MY OPINION”
Although the phrases are used interchangeably, Entitled means that you have been given a legal right or just claim to receive or do something. However, most dictionary definitions of entitle or entitled imply or flat out state that a person who is entitled believes themselves to be inherently deserving of privileges or special treatment and feel they deserve what they want without earning it and can take it from someone else just because of who they are. Yikes!
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Philosophers consider both statements as logical fallacy. “A logical fallacy is an error in reasoning that renders an argument invalid. All logical fallacies are arguments in which a conclusion doesn't follow logically from what preceded it.” https://www.thoughtco.com/what-is-logical-fallacy-1691259
Urbandictionary.com puts it, rather bluntly, this way: “You have the right to your opinion, but at the same time go fuck yourself and the horse you road in on.”
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​“I HAVE THE RIGHT TO EXPRESS MY OPINION”
The right to express your opinion is a separate issue. Generally speaking, yes, you do have the right to express your opinion … at this point in time.

Article 19 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, adopted in 1948 by the United Nations General Assembly, states that: “Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers.”  https://www.un.org/en/universal-declaration-human-rights/

However, the exercising of these rights carries "special duties and responsibilities" and may "therefore be subject to certain restrictions" when necessary "[f]or respect of the rights or reputation of others" or "[f]or the protection of national security or of public order (order public), or of public health or morals."  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom_of_speech

Although much of the world enjoys a political state of affairs which allows them to speak out without prosecution, that hasn’t always been true and could change in the future. There hasn’t always been a United States or United Nations to grant people freedom of speech.

No matter who or where we are, there are always other human beings who have, and will continue to have, the power and means to prevent most people from stating what they believe, good, bad, or indifferent. Whether or not that power is exercised is a separate matter. This is where the violence comes in. Keep in mind we have fought wars and earned Freedom of Speech.

The second point in this discussion: you do not have the right to expect anyone to listen to your opinion, act on it, or treat it as truth. Also, you do not have an equal right to be heard on a matter in which the other party is the only one with the relevant expertise and facts.

Before you express your opinion, take a moment to remember the following:
● Opinions are not fact; they are expressions of a point of view.
● Opinions are not actions.
● Opinions change frequently and are not binding commitments.
● Opinions are not necessarily rational.
● Opinions are not essential.
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​OPINIONS ARE NOT FACTS
Cortney S. Warren, Ph.D. writes, “A fact is a statement that can be supported to be true or false by data or evidence. In contrast, an opinion is a personal expression of a person’s feelings or thoughts that may or may not be based in data. Indeed, many of our opinions are based on emotions, personal history, and values—all of which can be completely unsupported by meaningful evidence.” www.psychologytoday.com/

We tend to protect and defend our opinions because they are an expression of us; our values, self esteem, beliefs, goals, education, identity, and our views on the specific subject. On the surface, opinions give us a voice. People agreeing with our opinions gives us validation. An attack on our opinions is like an attack on our physical person, and the human reaction is to defend yourself with anything you can use.
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It never hurts to listen to others and assess their points as well as the significance of the opinion. We need to take a step back and assess the importance of any opinion.
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NOT ALL OPINIONS ARE CREATED EQUAL
Warren makes sense when he states all opinions are not equally valuable, depending on the manner in which they were formulated. In the hierarchy of Opiniondom, those based on facts, knowledge, and analysis have the highest value because they can be treated by others as serious candidates for the truth. That still doesn’t make them true, but those informed opinions are a step toward finding the truth – and they are much easier to defend.

The lowest order of opinion is the gut-reaction; a view based on personal experience with nothing else to back it up. As Bill Bullard, lawyer and former member of the Michigan State legislature, says, “Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability and no understanding.”

The second face of this pyramid is the significance of the subject matter. You could have all the data and facts in the world that prove you look better in a long red dress rather than in a short black dress, but it’s an issue that only matters to you and maybe to your mother and your dressmaker. Essentially trivial and inconsequential on a larger scale, although not to you within your sphere of activity.

The third face of the discussion focuses on who has the opinion and who will listen to it. Obviously human beings formulate opinions about nearly everything. Sometimes it’s just the way of nature. Other times people formulate opinion with purposeful intent, which usually implies influencing some kind of future action, whether it be the selection of healthy food in the grocery store or advising the Commander in Chief about declaring war.

The people who opinions are valuable arrive at their conclusions because they have expertise and facts and have looked at all sides of the issues. Their opinions will carry weight with decision makers because of that. Mediawatch host Jonathan Holmes says, “there’s evidence, and there’s bulldust,.and it’s not part of a reporter’s job to give bulldust equal time with serious expertise.” http://theconversation.com/no-youre-not-entitled-to-your-opinion-9978
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WHY DO WE CONTINUE TO USE THE PHRASE?
First and foremost, the reality is our opinions only matter when we are in a position to affect change. The rest is pretty much useless mental and emotional clutter.

The reason people continue to use this phrase, although it is meaningless, reveals a great deal about the individual making the statement. According to most of my research, people speak these phrases in order to close down and walk away from a disagreement and/or to discredit or manipulate someone. The phrases are used as a way to:

● To end the debate when it is a waste of time and effort to continue because the issue cannot be resolved at that moment, at that location, or by the people engaged.

● To silence others who have different opinions and not let them have their say. To silence opinions you do not want to hear.

● To “save face” by defusing an argument or disagreement and presenting the opportunity for both parties to walk away; agreeing to disagree is a “No Harm” solution most of the time.

● To offer an excuse for not believing the truth or the facts.

● To finish the argument when the speaker has: 1) hit the wall defending their position; 2) knows or suspects they are incorrect, 3) has no evidence to back up the opinion. It is the last ditch effort to justify an indefensible point of view by defending their right to hold an opinion, no matter how stupid, ignorant or ill-founded it may be.

● To prevent yelling, a fight, or serious consequences from the disagreement.

● To discredit one or more participants in opposition by implying the opposition is of no value and it’s not worth the time to even talk to them.

● To demonstrate to others that the opposition is less smart or less knowledgeable by tearing them down or refusing to budge; It’s giving the opposition the brushoff as being unworthy of listening to.

● To justify the speaker’s belief that he/she can say of think whatever they like and implying that continuing to disagree with them is disrespectful.

● To cover up the speaker’s ignorance in order to protect their misconstrued beliefs.
​
● To have the satisfaction of getting in the last word.
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THAT’S MY OPINION AND I’M STICKING TO IT
Nothing we or others can do will stop our brains from formulating opinions or developing personal preferences, but there are things we can do.

● Give up the belief that you need an opinion on everything. Save your angst and energy for those things that are important and you can actually do something about. That’s not just an excuse to be lazy or apathetic about things. Sure, you can’t actually make the decisions on issues before congress, but you can vote for the people who do. Don’t undersell the ways in which you can affect actions and decisions.

● If an issue falls into the “important” category and is worth your time to have an opinion, it is also worth your time to inform yourself of the facts, or at least the pros and cons.

● When you express your opinion, say why you believe that and be able to reasonably argue for it with evidence and real facts. If it’s trivial, don’t bother talking about it.
​
● Abandon the dismissive phrase “That’s just your opinion” and focus on whether people can offer good reasons for the claims they make – reasons that might compel us to share their views.

Patrick Stokes, noted philosopher, suggests that the “next time you hear someone declare they’re entitled to their opinion, ask them why they think that. Chances are, if nothing else, you’ll end up having a more enjoyable conversation that way.” qz.com/852709/a-philosophy
□
Sources:
https://qz.com/852709/a-philosophy-professor-explains-why-youre-not-entitled-to-your-opinion
https://www.philosophersmag.com/essays/26-the-fact-opinion-distinction
https://strangenotions.com/fact-and-opinion/
http://home.sandiego.edu/~baber/logic/6.Knowledge.pdf
https://philosophy.stackexchange.com/questions/8053/what-is-the-difference-between-fact-and-truth
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27m_entitled_to_my_opinion
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Relativist_fallacy
http://theconversation.com/no-youre-not-entitled-to-your-opinion-9978
https://medium.com/@neallwebster/sorry-but-you-are-not-entitled-to-your-opinion-ef4b06b3f094
http://bit.ly/1hC2Atp
http://bit.ly/1EPUB0x
http://bit.ly/1Jf4ngV
https://goo.gl/frzEch
http://bit.ly/1JekZDa
https://www.oxfordscholarship.com/view/10.1093/acprof:oso/9780198252177.001.0001/acprof-9780198252177-chapter-33
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=You%20are%20entitled%20to%20your%20opinion
https://www.iep.utm.edu/ep-en/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/naked-truth/201706/your-right-opinion-does-not-make-your-opinion-valid
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/stop-letting-other-peoples-opinions-control-you_b_9587330z
https://digest.bps.org.uk/2018/05/31/people-who-think-their-opinions-are-superior-to-others-are-most-prone-to-overestimating-their-relevant-knowledge-and-ignoring-chances-to-learn-more/
https://fs.blog/2017/10/opinions-on-everything/
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/15-important-truths-about_b_5532585
https://www.inc.com/kat-boogaard/6-key-tips-to-respectfully-disagree-with-someone.html
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/sorry-you-entitled-your-opinion-bruce-d-
http://quantumperformanceinc.com/agreeing-to-disagree-is-always-a-cop-out/
https://www.onewithnow.com/no-opinion/
https://www.someecards.com/usercards/viewcard/tell-me-again-how-you-pay-my-bills-clean-my-house-raise-my-kids-and-live-hereoh-wait-you-dont-so-sit-down-and-keep-your-opinions-to-yourself-thanks-700d7/?tagSlug=mom|
https://www.permaculturevoices.com/agruing-with-reality-and-making-yourself-miserable-with-javan-bernakevitch/
https://www.philosophersmag.com/essays/26-the-fact-opinion-distinction
https://strangenotions.com/fact-and-opinion/
https://philosophy.stackexchange.com/questions/8053/what-is-the-difference-between-fact-and-truth
https://www.inc.com/kat-boogaard/6-key-tips-to-respectfully-disagree-with-someone.html
https://digest.bps.org.uk/2018/05/31/people-who-think-their-opinions-are-superior-to-others-are-most-prone-to-overestimating-their-relevant-knowledge-and-ignoring-chances-to-learn-more/

More Resources:
Whyte, Jamie (2004). "The Right to Your Opinion". Crimes Against Logic.
New York: McGraw-Hill. ISBN 0-07-144643-5.
Deleuze, Gilles (1994). "The Image of Thought". Difference and Repetition. Paul Patton (trans.).
New York: Columbia University Press. ISBN 0-231-08159-6.
Whyte, Jamie (August 9, 2004). "Sorry, but you are not entitled to your opinion".
The Times. News UK. Archived from the original on February 8, 2011.
Stokes, Patrick (9 October 2012). "You're not entitled to your opinion".
New Zealand Herald. Retrieved 7 April 2017.
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YOU'VE COME A LONG WAY, BABY: The Art of pumpkin carving

10/25/2019

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YOU’VE COME A LONG WAY, BABY
Halloween is Thursday, October 31. This is my last chance to write something about Halloween. But what is left to write about Halloween that isn’t redundant?
​
Not much, but I like to recognize the holidays in my blog … so I’m thinking. Pumpkins? Jack’o lanterns? Naw. No one  wants to read about pumpkins being one of the most popular crops in the US or that it is a cultivar of a squash plant. I don't think so.
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IN THE BEGINNING
Pumpkins, native to North America, are one of the oldest domesticated plants. I don’t know what they looked like 7,500 BC, but they were here.  When Europeans came to the new world, they brought the tradition of carving vegetables – turnips, primarily – into lanterns at Samhain for the purpose of keeping away the evil spirits. Because turnips were scarce in those area, the settlers substituted with lanterns carved out of the plentiful pumpkins.    
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The turnip carvings in the photos are typical of the kind of lantern carved by the early settlers.

​In the 1940s, when I first met the carved Halloween pumpkin as a child, they had taken on more personality but were still relatively simple in looks with triangles for nose and eyes.                                                                                                         ▼
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​IT’S A NEW AGE, EVEN FOR PUMPKINS
By the 21st Century, the superstitious carving vegetables had become the sophisticated fine art of pumpkin carving. Pumpkin carving contests abound, and innovation and imagination displayed is amazing. The activity seems to fall into three categories.

Just For Fun - The More Traditional Front Porch Style
Just for Fun pumpkin carving is the home carved type that are fun to make. Many are just as innovative and well crafted as competition pumpkins.

​syracusecountrydancers.org/pumpkin 2016        jiernaair.com/pumpkin-carving-contest/       pinterest.com/660973682788134247
                ▼                                      ▼                               ▼                                   ▼
Competition Pumpkins
All sorts of organizations have pumpkin carving contests. Many sell the pumpkins to raise funds for charities and other good causes.
​
These pumpkins are as much about the innovative and imaginative idea as the carving skill, but the skill level is high. There are tons of website about carving ideas, so the judges are looking for something new. Pumpkins eating things, like the squirrel and cannibalistic pumpkins below, seem to be popular but maybe overdone. 
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          ▼sep.yimg.com/bloody-eyeball                pinterest.com/222928250277002249 ▼                                 pinterest.com/99571841739011579/  ▼
                                                 ▲pinterest.com/539657967822747214                                  ▲motobilt.com/1st-motobilt-pumpkin-carving

​Some of the competition pumpkin fall into what I would call the fine arts category. These require excellent carving skills and artistic ability.

Carving: Ray Villafane                 youtube.com/LTcuXLqVuKA         Carving: Ray Villafane                             PhotoCredit: Anthony Souffle                lifeasahuman.com/2010/arts-culture                                                pinterest.com/461548661785643629       startribune.com/pumpkin-carving    
                 ▼                                                     ▼                                                 ▼                                     ▼Carving: Jodi Engel                     
                 ​▲                                   ​▲                      ▲Nasa Jet Propulsion Lab   ​     ▲Carving: Kelly Finke     geeksraisinggeeks.com/ZQuinto ▲
honestlywtf.com/pumpkins/             honestlywtf.com/rarebirds            space.com/nasa-pumpkin        Swarthmore.edu/pumpkin-carving 

Decorating Ideas
Finally, Halloween pumpkins serve as home and party decorations, as well as decorations for commercial business.
Have fun carving your pumpkin.

Sources
http://www.history.com/topics/halloween/jack-olantern-history
http://www.pumpkincarving101.com/pumpkin_carving_history.html
http://www.motherearthliving.com/natural-health/history-of-carving-pumpkins
http://www.pumpkinnook.com/facts.htm
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSvb2o5wyEI
https://topsfieldfair.org/giantpumpkins.php
http://romae.org/blog/2008/10/22/the-roman-origins-of-halloween/
https://alphamom.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/CreeperPumpkins21.jpg
https://www.instructables.com/id/Spooky-Edible-Eyeballs/
https://www.pinterest.com/1inspiredwoman/fruit-vegetable-carvings/?lp=true
http://www.globeslcc.com/2014/10/30/halloween-facts-origins/
https://www.urbanorganicgardener.com/2015/10/the-halloween-turnip-an-american-history/
https://munchies.vice.com/en_us/article/pgx58g/evil-irish-turnips-were-the-original-jack-o-lanterns
https://www.annieandre.com/carve-scary-turnip-jack-olantern-halloween-not-pumpkin/
https://www.geeksraisinggeeks.com/geeky-pumpkin-carving-ideas/


 
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Online Dating

10/18/2019

0 Comments

 
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THE JURY STILL OUT?
In 1954 Darrell Huff wrote a book entitled How To Lie With Statistics. It’s been revised a few times, but it is still in print. I’m convinced every survey, no matter how correctly designed, uses some of the principles from this work. Otherwise, how can so many studies be so contradictory?

Take the topic of Online Dating, for example. Recent headlines range from “Online Dating Marriage Success Statistics” and “Meeting Online Leads To Happier, More-Enduring-Marriages” to the other end of the spectrum which claim new studies suggest that “Couples Who Meet Online Far More Likely to Have Marriages End in Divorce.”

ALAS, ALL WE HAVE TO GO ON ARE CONFLICTING STUDIES
One thing all researchers seem to be clear about is that online dating is affecting how couples meet in the US, and how long all couples stay together. This is accompanied by an implied impression that this is having a more profound effect on society that anyone expected.

How I Met Your Mother
It wasn’t until the 1990s that anyone met online. By the end of the first decade of the 21st century, about one third of all people who dated met online and slightly less than one quarter of people over 50.
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Photo Source: https://static.eharmony.com/blog/how-you-meet-your-spouse-matters/
General public opinion about online dating has changed also. In 2005 only 44% of US adults believed online dating was a good way to meet people. In 2015, 59% believed online dating was a good way to meet potential dates.

Before the 21st century the primary way to meet potential mates was through social networking: friends, family, work, church, special interests. As a result, most people fell in love with, and married, people who had certain life aspects in common. One fifth of the way into the 21st century, we have opened up the meeting/dating pool to far greater diversity in race, religion, sexual orientation, nationality, and so on.

Some psychologists believe bringing together more people from various cultures and ethnicities would result with more interracial couples and, hopefully, help alleviate prejudices and racism. While I believe that couples do need some things in common to be happy, I also see greater diversity as a way to enrich our lives, increase our understanding, and eat away at the prejudices that separate us by creating new links within society that didn’t exist before.

One point in favor of online dating.

Marriage
Unlike the days of arranged marriages and marriages of necessity, in 2019 meeting a potential mate is the first step. And if the older methods of meeting people caused us to marry people more or less like ourselves, online dating should, and has, resulted in more diversity in marriages as well. According to the statistics of the Brain Research Institute, 1 in 5 relationships and a little more than 1 in 6 marriages begin online. www.datingadvice.com/online-dating
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Experts agree those numbers are only going to grow, as more than 49 million people have tried online dating, and nearly 8,000 dating sites exist in the world. Nearly ten percent of the US population visit these sites daily, and participation isn’t cheap. Although there are free services available, from an economic standpoint online dating is a $3 billion-a-year business.

However, when it comes to studies about the success and duration of marriage that begin with online dating, the jury is still out. The results seem to point in all directions.

Photo Credit: The Social Firm
Photo Source: pinterest.com/pin/292452569522774655/

GIVE ME THE BAD NEWS FIRST
Because experiences with online dating vary, some people are satisfied and others not. Everyone claims there are Pros and Cons to meeting potential dates and/or mates in this manner. I have some good news and some bad news.

The Bad News First – The Negatives

● If you’ve never done anything like this before, it may create feelings of discomfort and take time to get used to.

● It’s a crowded digital space, and it can be exhausting having to weed out the good from the bad.

● The choice of partners can become confusing and overwhelming, or disappointing.
Online daters can get stuck endlessly "shopping" for the perfect partner, rather than actually starting a satisfying relationship. Having choices is great, but keep them manageable.
   If you want an actual face-to-face dating interaction, don't get stuck endlessly "browsing" online hoping for someone better to come along. Narrow your search to a small location, or a certain set of "make-or-break" features, characteristics, interests, -- whatever is most important to you. After your narrow it down, rather than just "shopping", talk to those who make the list.
   For men, on average, only about half of your initial emails will get a response. From there some women will drop off and only a smaller percentage will meet up for a date. For attractive women in their 20’s, so many emails may come in that it is overwhelming.

● Many men online are not seeking a meaningful relationship.
“One of the big problems with online dating for women is that, although there are genuine relationship-seeking men on the sites, there are also plenty of guys on there simply looking for sex. While most people would agree that on average men are more eager for sex than women, it seems that many men make the assumption that if a woman has an online dating presence, she’s interested in sleeping with relative strangers.”
psychologytoday.com//the-mating-game

● It can be difficult to stick to one site, making the experience stressful.

● Sitting on a computer and interacting via email can get boring and disappointing, particularly if you are just waiting for responses.
If you go out to a bar to meet women (even if you get shot down 1,000 times) you can still feel productive.  At least there you’re developing your social skills.

● Evaluating a match is hard without any physical interaction.
Psychologists warn computer-mediated communication may have an artificial and unemotional quality since it can be harder to evaluate a potential match online where you cannot pick up on cues and features that build attraction, like touching and body language. We pick up a lot of information with our physical senses.
                                                                                                                                                                                                                Cartoon by Bill Whitehead
                                                                                                                                   Cartoon Source:  https://www.cartoonstock.com/directory/o/online_dating.asp
● Matching is a difficult process and testing may not be accurate for everyone.
I assume “computer matching” is likely to identify clearly incompatible matches, but could possibly overlook potentially good partners in the process.
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“I said I’m looking for a date who is soft, sweet,
and a little bit nutty. They matched me with a
loaf of banana bread.”
Cartoon Credit: Randy Glasbergen
Photo Sourse chinalovematch.net/magazinearticle
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​● People lie on their profiles.
Why are you not surprised? Online dating sites will admit many users lie on their online dating profiles. Men users most commonly lie about age, height and income, whereas female users lie about weight, physical build and age. Women pick the most flattering picture possible which may not represent the current reality.

● Your best chance is still meeting through a friend.
Despite everything, eHarmony states that statistics currently show you are more likely to meet “the one” by being introduced through a mutual friend. In fact, that’s how 63% of          Photo Source:                          married couples met their spouse.
www.fittitude2freedom.com/the-dating-game/

Now The Good News – The Positives
The primary rationale of online dating is meeting potential partners [for just hooking up, dating to have fun, dating with the intent of getting into a relationship, dating with the intent of finding a longer term partner, spouse, companion, mate] for subsequent person-to-person contact. In that respect, online dating serves its purpose in the 21st century. In my opinion, the positives are fewer in number but compelling in quality. They include:

● There is no longer as much social stigma to meeting online.

● Meeting online is easy and convenient.
To quote one site: “You can connect with women without having to bother with things like putting on pants.” [Clearly written by a man]

● Meeting online saves time.
Dating takes time, and in today’s world some people who want a relationship don’t have the time for endless dating to find a companion. Why waste time on relationships that eventually will not work.
                                                                                                                         Cartoon by Out There By George;' Photo source: www.toonpool.com/cartoons
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​● Dating sites match based on compatibility and personality.
Such matching can help guide individuals toward dating partners who may be more compatible. Gone are the days of sitting through awkward blind dates–most dating sites use personality tests to guide users toward their best match.

● Dating online gives access to people you might not have ever crossed paths with.
Online dating allows people to connect with a much larger dating pool which is no longer limited to the people you went to school with or live near, or friends of friends. It dating allows you to meet and connect with people you probably never would have met without the Internet. If you’re interested in a particular type, orientation, and lifestyle or live in a rather isolated area, online dating gives you access to more potential partners.

● Meeting online allows screening and reduces risk before investing effort, money, and time.
As crass as that sounds, it’s true. Face-to-face dating takes a certain level of commitment you may or may not want to invest in. And if you are shy or not socially inclined, the risks of dating may seem overpowering.

● The odds are pretty good.
One out of five relationships start online [the percentage may be debatable, but it’s close]. Such computer-mediated communication allows for safe and convenient interaction, without much risk or time commitment. For the busy professional, or the safety-conscious, such communication is an excellent way to "test" potential partners.

Now The Really Bad News - A Word of Warning
Be careful! Don’t let infatuation or anything else cloud your thinking. There are a lot of nuts and predators out there. The dating sites and surveys don’t address this – quite the opposite: they run from it -- but dating online can be dangerous and requires the application of good sense, which is often in short supply, young or old.

According to Tony Neate, CEO of Get Safe Online, a UK-based non-profit, “actual physical attacks are only part of the picture. Online dating is also the source for financial and other scams [such as obtaining your financial data] that cause emotional trauma … I honestly believe there is a lot more that the online dating companies can do” to protect users … No dating company has ever approached this organization for a conversation about safety.” Instead, he claims, when he tried to talk to them they are “very defensive” on the issue. https://qz.com/dangerous-online-dating

Recent data from opinionmatters shows 53% of people lie on their profiles. Most of them – such as lying about age or using younger pictures -- fall into the category of “white lies” which won’t hurt anyone else, although they may jinks the dating. However, predators who lie can be very convincing. Things are not always as they seem, even after a surprising number of dates.
                                                                                                             Cartoon by: SHIERS Jr. Creativet; Photo source: www.courierherald.com/safe-online-dating
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Most of the reported crimes include robbery, financial scams [confidence fraud / romance schemes], and sexual assault. No doubt many crimes are not reported to anyone – the dating service or the police.

Retired Toronto Police sex crimes detective, Suzanne Kernohan says online dating provides a new hunting ground for sexual predators. “Don’t be afraid to sit down at the table and say, ‘Okay, this might sound silly but I don’t know who you are. Can I have a look at your driver’s license?’”
globalnews.ca/news/1875533/sexual-predators
 
 FINISH





Sources:
https://www.apa.org/topics/divorce/
https://www.marketwatch.com/story/what-online-dating-could-do-to-divorce-rates-2017-10-16
https://www.technologyreview.com/s/609091/first-evidence-that-online-dating-is-changing-the-nature-of-society/
https://www.datingadvice.com/online-dating/online-dating-marriage-success
https://www.businessinsider.com/happy-marriage-online-dating-2017-10
https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/science/science-news/11124140/Couples-who-met-online-three-times-more-likely-to-divorce.html
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/dating-in-the-digital-age/201712/is-meeting-online-good-marriages
https://www.datingnews.com/industry-trends/online-dating-statistics-what-they-mean-for-future/
https://www.cnsnews.com/mrctv-blog/dan-joseph/couples-meet-online-far-more-likely-have-marriages-end-divorce
https://www.bustle.com/articles/41802-couples-who-meet-through-online-dating-are-more-likely-to-divorce-new-study-says
https://www.zoosk.com/date-mix/online-dating-advice/online-dating-statistics-dating-stats-2017/
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2016/03/23/the-truth-about-online-dating-according-to-someone-who-has-been-studying-it-for-years/
https://www.50more.com/blog/2017/10/19/how-effective-is-online-dating
https://www.apa.org/topics/divorce/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Online_dating_service
https://harlequinblog.com/2011/04/online-dating-and-romance-novels/
https://www.bustle.com/articles/170836-9-ways-reading-romance-novels-will-help-your-online-dating-game
https://www.glamour.com/story/romance-novelists-online-harassment-social-media
https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2018/10/divorce-united-states-dropping-because-millennials/
https://www.wf-lawyers.com/divorce-statistics-and-facts/
https://news.uchicago.edu/story/meeting-online-leads-happier-more-enduring-marriages
https://www.infoplease.com/us/marital-status/marriages-and-divorces-1900-2012
https://qz.com/890320/nobody-know-how-dangerous-online-dating-really-is-and-dating-sites-wont-talk-about-it/
https://globalnews.ca/news/1875533/sexual-predators-increasingly-find-victims-on-dating-sites-police-warn/
https://whnt.com/2019/04/25/online-dating-popularity-continues-to-rise-so-do-associated-dangers/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mating-game/201609/the-ugly-truth-about-online-dating
https://static.eharmony.com/blog/how-you-meet-your-spouse-matters/
http://www.ootem.com/uncategorized/if-youre-single-and-you-like-to-mingle-head-to-the-nearest-laptop/
 

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    Author R. Ann Siracusa

    Novelist, retired architect and urban planner, world traveler, quilter, owl collector, devoted wife-mother-grandmother, great-grandmother, and, according to some, wild-assed liberal.

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